When we started our trip home after our son was born, one of the hardest moments was saying goodbye to Little MPB’s birth mother. You see, nothing about his birth went according to plan when. We almost missed his birth due to bad weather that forced us to land in a neighbouring state to wait out the bad weather while his birth mom went into labour. We ended up all sharing 1 hospital room for the first 24 hours of his life, as the hospital had never done an adoption before and wouldn’t follow the birth mom’s wish to have a separate room for her and another room for Little MPB and us. Then, we couldn’t take Little MPB to his pediatrician appointment 2 days after he was born because we didn’t have the right paperwork, so his birth mom just came with us. Then, we couldn’t travel as quickly as planned, so we just hunkered down in the town he was born (in a hotel without a kitchen). This meant we spent the first week of Little MPB’s life with daily visits from his birth mom.
Truthfully, it’s not what we expected, but it was such a special week because we all got to know each other and make some memories together. She got to see us attempting to become first time parents, which I can only imagine was slightly entertaining. She got to hold and snuggle Little MPB basically whenever she wanted. We met her friends and they met us. She showed us the tourists sites, and took us around town. We did shopping trips together. We all went out to lunch and/or supper together every day. Looking back, it was such a special time, and I am so glad we had that time together.
But, it also meant saying goodbye was presumably even harder then any of us expected. We all knew when out last visit together was going to be the morning we started our attempt at crossing the USA. And it was such an emotional visit. Some of our parting words were that this isn’t goodbye forever, we’ll be back.
And, we thought we’d be back within a year or two. But then, the adoption process and Canadian citizenship process seemed to take forever. And of course, life just got in the way.
But now, we are officially planning a long weekend trip to visit Little MPB’s birth mother and sibling. We asked if it was okay and she said yes. So, we are going to make this visit happen at some point in 2018. And you know what? I’m not that nervous. I honestly think it will be great for Little MPB to meet her, even if he wont remember it later in life because he’s still too young. I think it’s important for his relationship with her to know her in real life. I also I think it’s important to us to keep our word that we will visit.
Truthfully, since our travel plans are in the very early stages, I have to admit that currently I’m just incredibly annoyed at the costs of flights! My gosh, who knew it could be so expensive to get to the middle of no-where?!
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I’m sitting in a hotel room watching home improvement shows (we don’t have cable, so I have to get my fix while I can). Of course, my computer is on, which means I am also using this quiet evening to get some work done.
As I sit here responding to emails, I just got this text from Mr. MPB:
I had someone arrive to pick up our old printer that we sold on Craigs List. Little MPB is crying in bed. Doodle MPB just pushed down the gate at the bottom of the stairs and ran upstairs. Again. She learned that earlier today. Little MPB wont go to sleep, he wants to snuggle in MommyDaddy bed.
It clearly sounds like Mr. MPB is experiencing a chaotic evening. And, I’m clearly not around to help as I’m 3 hours from home.
I feel bad that I’m unable to help. I feel bad that Little MPB is having a rough time falling asleep tonight and I’m not there to help my little boy. He’s such a good sleeper so nights like the one Mr. MPB is dealing with right now throw us for such a loop. Also, Doodle MPB is a continual frustration and I just perpetually feel bad that I forced a puppy onto our family and currently Mr. MPB has to deal with her while I’m away. And truthfully, I’m also a bit nervous that come tomorrow when I get home Mr. MPB will be annoyed at me for being away because he had to do everything and he’ll be tired from his rough night and a lack of sleep.
But, I also kind of okay with it. I know Mr. MPB can handle it all. He’s a completely capable Dad, and truly doesn’t need me. I’ll be home tomorrow, so we will all survive tonight. I just might get a bit more sleep then Mr. MPB tonight, of course this is assuming I manage to sleep tonight as I normally don’t sleep well in hotels by myself.
Honestly, I cannot lie, part of me also just wishes I had a glass of wine to enjoy tonight while I relax and sleep in a giant king sized bed.
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My Perfect Breakdown 