I’m on the road again with work, so I’m going to make this short and sweet.
- Being on the road with work is just not fun – it’s always horribly long days. I miss Little MPB and Mr. MPB dearly. And, I simply hate winter driving. I was supposed to be home this whole week, and somehow I ended up with two last minute requests from clients to meet in person. And I couldn’t coordinate them to be on the same day, so I have 2 days of travel.
Last weekend Mr. MPB and I went on our 4th date since Little MPB was born. We were given free amazing seats to an event, so we decided to make a night out of it. We hired a babysitter and went for a toddler-free dinner too. I’ll admit, the entire time we were out, I felt like I was missing an arm. Mr. MPB and I obsessively talked about Little MPB – we both missed him so much!! By random chance, this weekend, we have date nights 5 & 6 arranged with good friends. I’m sure we will have fun, but I know I am going to miss Little MPB so much!- There are a few things about our adoption journey that I never shared. In part because I couldn’t bring myself to relive the events in my mind in order to write about them. And in part because we were still in the adoption process and I couldn’t risk really upsetting the wrong people, should they have ever found my blog and pieced together who I am. But, we are officially done everything, so I’ve decided it’s time I share the not so good stuff we were put through. I would never want to scare someone off from adoption, but I also want to be honest about everything we went through so others may be less naïve then we were. So, I’ve decided to dig deep and write about what our USA agency actually did to us when we were in the USA, which may help better explain why I doubt we’ll ever adopt again. Stay tuned.
- I’m sick again. I had a decent run of being healthy for a few months, but the sickness has returned. I am still absolutely shocked how much I’ve been sick since becoming a parent. How much and how often I’ve been sick is the part of becoming a parent that I completely did not expected and was completely unprepared for.
- We took Little MPB on a Pumpkin Hunt. He HATED it. When we found the pumpkin, he simply pushed it away while saying no pumpin. We now have his little pumpkin sitting in the house and whenever he sees it he says no pumpin. How do we teach him about Halloween so he’s not petrified come October 31st? Tips would be much appreciated!
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One thing we’ve learned about adoption is that people only every talk to me about it. As in, strangers, family members, friends, acquaintances, work colleagues, basically everyone asks me questions.
No-one ever asked Mr. MPB questions.
Now, I may be biased, but I do think Mr. MPB is pretty approachable and he’s generally a pretty decent guy. So, I really don’t think this is about him.
In fact, I know it’s not about him. When investigating adoption we were told by other families brought together through adoption and our location adoption agency, that people basically only ever ask the mom questions. (The only exception to that is that people will ask the child directly if the child is of a different race from the parents – which I think is a crazy). Anyways, this is been very true in our lives. I’m asked questions all the time. In fact, only once has Mr. MPB even been around when people ask me questions.
Which means no-one has ever asked Mr. MPB an adoption related question, on his own.
But last week, Mr. MPB was working with someone and adoption somehow came up in conversation. Apparently, the other individual praised Mr. MPB for our decision to adopt, and was asking lots of questions about why we chose the USA not Canada. Mr. MPB thought it was very odd as he’s never experienced a conversation like this before. But, what struck him as exceptionally odd was that he was using adoption friendly/appropriate language – birth family, open adoption, closed adoption, placed, etc.
Evidently, this was so odd, that Mr. MPB asked the individual how they are so knowledgeable about adoption.
It turns out, years and years ago the individual chose to place a child for adoption in a closed adoption before open adoption became more of the norm. To this day, this individual firmly believes it was the right decision for everyone involved and has the upmost respect and appreciation for parents like us. Hence, the individual knows a lot about adoption and was very curious why we left the country considering they know first hand that adoptions do happen locally.
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I wasn’t part of the conversation, but I’ll admit, upon Mr. MPB’s retelling of it, I was thrilled that someone finally asked Mr. MPB an adoption related question! (We had been wondering how long it would take for someone to ask him a question about adoption – turns out, it took over 1.5 years). But mostly, for me, I thought it was great that Mr. MPB was able to have a real conversation with someone who understands adoption and can offer a different perspective.
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My Perfect Breakdown 