Time Making Machine
It’s official, I’ve become a bad friend.
In my attempt to balance parenting and work, I’ve completely let my friendships slide. Friendships in real life, and friendships through my blog.
One friend, a mother living in the excoriatingly hard adoption wait, I cannot remember the last time I texted or talked to her.
Another friend, one who I used to have lunch with at least once or twice a month, well, it’s now been more months then I can count since I managed to fit in a visit. And soon enough she’s moving so I just know how much I’m going to regret this.
And, my blogger friends, the ones I regularly/semi-regularly email with. Well, needless to say I suck at writing those emails.
At the moment I’m so busy that I’m struggling to manage my time. I fully admit I place a premium on my time with Little MPB and Mr. MPB – they always come first. And right now, work is more demanding then I’d like. Oh, and then there’s basic life responsibilities like grocery shopping, taking Little MPB to the doctor (he’ll be fine, just lots of snot and coughing), putting gas in my car (which I almost ran out of for the first time in my life last week), getting my car fixed (because apparently it’s bound and determined to die or at the very least make us give way too much money to a mechanic), finish Christmas shopping, etc.
But this means that my social time, my time to spend with friends is basically gone. Honestly, I feel as though I’ve become that mom who lets everything around her slide once becoming a mom. Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE being a mom, but I really don’t want to be that mom. I don’t have a lot of really good friends, so the ones I do have, mean the world to me. And honestly, I miss them. And I have no-one to blame but myself.
I know this is just one of those busy seasons in my life. But, I also don’t accept that as an excuse, I really feel like I’m dropping the ball on every person in my life outside of the MPBs. I hate it. It’s not like I can easily say to people, hey, I’m busy until January 2 – can we talk then? That’s not how life works. And more then anything, that’s not the friend I want to be.
So, somehow, I have to find time for my friends. And, while I’m at it, I also need to find time to get back to some sort of fitness routine. Oh and I desperately need time to get my eyebrows done too. A pedicure would also be nice.
Clearly, I have a time management problem.
Can someone please invent a time making machine for me? I just need more time to do everything I want to do…
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My Perfect Breakdown 
I think people who are truly friends will understand that you’re busier than normal right now. You can’t be Wonder woman and do EVERYTHING, there just isn’t enough time sometimes. You have to prioritize, and there’s nothing wrong with that. I personally would accept hearing that you’re swamped with life until X date, at least then I would know I wasn’t simply forgotten about or being ignored on purpose. You’re dealing with a lot right now, and this time of year is busy for everyone anyway. Don’t be so hard on yourself!
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I think probably every mom (or really every person) feels like she has a time management problem! It’s impossible to be perfect in every facet of life, and I think adulthood is an exercise in learning to be ok with that. It’s really hard! I think your good friends will understand that things are crazy for you right now.
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I have a friend who I will see once every 5-6 months and every time we meet up for dinner we say that we have to make more of an effort to do it more often. We never follow through with it. Months will go by without any text messages, then one of us will initiate trying to meet up. We will take weeks to settle on a date which will be 3-4 weeks later and almost always, we have to reschedule. I have a kid, she doesn’t. But she’s completely understanding of it and is always accommodating. That’s what true friends do. They understand the situation of a full time working mom and they will stick with you through it! Thanks to social media, we can stay “in tune” with our friend’s lives without being totally present in them. Which maybe is a good thing and a bad thing. My friend is having her first baby in February so I know she will quickly learn about how much her flexibility with scheduling means to me.
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Oh my goodness. SAME. That time spinner that Hermoine uses would do nicely. Or a couple clones of myself…
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i was just thinking about that too!
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Time is a precious commodity! Give yourself a break, this time of year is so difficult in general to be present and you have so much on your plate!
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I don’t think it’s a time management problem! I think it’s a cultural problem. We have too much coming at us, too much to do. I was a phenom friend until becoming a parent. Then–between kids, marriage and work–my plate was full. I’m sure yours is now . . .
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Unfortunately, even though we are Super women, we can not do it all. Do not be so hard on yourself. Xoxo
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Asahhh I know this feeling. I was sooooo good with email pre-Kids. Now I have to set time to work through my emails. I much prefer instant messaging options. We are all in the moment together having a chat as if we were having coffee and then onto other things. And if we are busy we respond later. This is by far the best result for me. Good luck working it all out. It is super hectic!!
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I hear you on the eyebrows! Mine are a wreck! And it only takes 5-10 minutes, but when it isn’t the priority, it is easy to find other life activities to fill that time.
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