Beyond Exhausted

I checked in with my doctor, and yes, I very likely do have an ulcer.  (There is no way to know for sure without another endoscope, but I wont be getting one of those anytime soon – I appreciate the Canadian health care system it is so much better then so many alternatives out there.  Especially when it comes to emergencies, but unfortunately non-emergent specialist appointments for things like a suspected ulcer, can take months (and months and months) and may never happen because the criteria to get a referral is so stringent).  The good news is that I now have non-expired medication.  The bad news is that the medication will take a few weeks to kick in.

My symptoms are spot on from the last few ulcers that I’ve had, so my doctor is confident that the problem.  If my stomach gets too empty, I’m in pain.  If I eat, I am in immense, crippling pain.  It’s a weird pain, it’s a combination of sever pain and the desperate desire to vomit.  But, I cannot vomit.  Instead, I eat small amounts of water and whole wheat bread throughout the day.  And some juice.  That’s it.  And let me tell you, it’s been less then a week of this diet, and I’ve had enough of it!

It was one thing to half starve myself to avoid the pain last time I had this, before Little MPB.  But now it’s not really possible.

Keeping up with a toddler requires nutritional food.

And, truthfully, for me, just being a happy person requires more of a balanced diet then just bread and water.

While we had a fantastic long weekend together, it was just me taking care of Little MPB while Mr. MPB was away fishing with the boys (it’s their yearly trip, which he skipped last year).  Little MPB and I had fun playing outside in the beautiful sunshine.  I loved not working for 3 straight days, and just playing with my favourite little guy.  But, I am completely exhausted.  In fact, is there a word for being beyond exhausted?  Because, that’s what I am – beyond exhausted.

But what pisses me off the most about this, if I had paid attention to my body, I would have been able to catch this early.  If I had listened to my stomach, I wouldn’t be this sick right now and I wouldn’t be facing a 4-6 (possibly 8) week recovery.

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30 Comments on “Beyond Exhausted

  1. This sounds absolutely dreadful! I’m so sorry! I have had an ulcer before, so in my own way I can sympathize. But I have never had to deal with an ulcer while caring for a toddler. 😦
    I used to get migraines when my kids were younger, and I remember suffering through them while having all three kids at home under my care. It is so challenging trying to take care of yourself when there are other people who you need to take care of first. Sending hugs!

    Liked by 1 person

    • It is dreadful! Did you find any foods were more tolerable then others? I’m open to any and all suggestions!
      If you can believe it the second I pushed post, I ended up with a migraine! Thankfully Mr. MPB is home and I’ve crawled back into bed.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I honestly can’t remember which foods were more tolerable than others back when I had an ulcer. I did get medicine from the doctor, and eventually that helped.

        I started getting migraines for the first time over four years ago. I eventually discovered that if I take 1 capsule of magnesium citrate (150 mg) daily, I don’t get migraines anymore.

        I hope you feel better today after getting some rest. I always found that putting cold water or cold cloths on my wrists, feet and back of my neck to be very helpful when I did get migraines.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. can you get an endoscope done without OHIP(I dont know whats it called in your state)Or just walk into emergency screaming of pain and say u do not have a health card and offer to pay for it.
    The sooner you get an endoscopy, the better you know how bad the damage is.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Shirt answer is no. Lomg answer js unless it is a bleeding ulcer, which thankfully mine is not, the specialist will not accept the referal at this point. If this lasts for a few months they may accept it but not until my doctor can prove he’s tried everything (blood work was done Friday and a h.pylori breath test is scheduled for the next available time slot at the end of June). As for the emergency idea, last time I tried that approach multiple times and again because it isn’t bleeding they won’t do an emergency scope even if I offered to pay.
      The biggest difference now is that because I had an endoscope in the past they won’t do another one to tell them the same thing. So for me to have a referral accepted is going to take extreme symptoms and lots and lots of time as I’ll be the lowest priority. Unfortunately.

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      • Good that its not a bleeding ulcer! Maybe a trip over the border is due if its too painful.
        Also, how about smoothies? does that hurt too?

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’m trying a smoothie tonight to see what happens. Because liquids seem better, I’m hoping I can add smoothies to my safe food list. 🙂

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  3. I’m so sorry you’re in such pain! And yes keeping up with a toddler requires nutritional food and copious amount of caffeine. 😉 hope you feel better soon!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m so sorry that you’re living with that much pain. I don’t have any suggestions because I’ve never had an ulcer, but I hope some of these things work for you and that you heal quickly!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I had gastritis at one point and it was horrific. I am so sorry you’re experiencing this and I hope is clears up faster than the 4-6 weeks you’ve been quoted.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Any tips for how to cope? Did you find any foods that were easier to eat then others? I’m desperate for suggestions! Today I ruled out Boost, but discovered plain pasta is safe. It seems like carbs are my friend right now.

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      • I found that increasing my water intake really helped a lot. And lots of bland foods like potatoes, rice, pasta (like you said), white bread (not wheat for some reason) were good. Dairy was a no no, sadly. The doctor put me on protonix and it took about 4 weeks to go away (but got progressively better over that time period). And don’t eat near bedtime! Good luck my friend!

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