Getting on With Getting On
One decision Mr. MPB and I have clearly made this week is that no matter what we decide about a second child, we need to get on with getting on. We need to keep living and keep enjoying life – I feel like when I’m focusing on wanting another child or I think about what we went through to get Baby MPB, I’m focusing on what we don’t have. Yet, we really are so incredibly fortunate to have Baby MPB, to be happily married, to live in Canada, to have our nice home and feel safe and secure on a daily basis. Life is often too short, so we need to be enjoying what we have right now.
We both know that if we have a second child that child will have to fit into our life with Baby MPB, not our lives fitting into a second child. (Does that make sense? It not supposed to sound horrible, but re-reading that sentence it kind of sounds horrible). What I mean is that we will not drastically alter Baby MPB’s life to accommodate a second child. We will only have a second child if we can find a way to comfortably afford a second child while giving BOTH children the same opportunities in life. For example, we know we want to be able to pay for our child(ren’s) university education – we wont compromise Baby MPB’s chance at a debt university for a second child. Instead, we need to be rather confident we can afford to send two kids to university, not just one. They need to be equals without compromising our hopes and dreams for either of them. Maybe that helps this make more sense?
So, anyways, what does the MPB family do when we decide it’s time to focus on living happily with what we have?
First, we contemplate doing something really fun that involves making a lifetime dream come true.
Second, we look at our bank accounts to confirm what kind of financial shape we are in. (Mr. MPB always knows this, but in our opinion it’s always best to triple-check before we commit to spending a lot of money).
Third, we look at and reconfirm our schedule for paying off our debt associated with our international adoption. We know our debt repayment is a multi-year process because we are not drastically altering our lifestyle to pay it off right away as we’ve made the decision not to compromise most things in our lives to pay off the debt sooner. For example,
- We are still eating fresh and mostly healthy home made meals which are more expensive then say Kraft dinner every night (I’m not knocking Kraft dinner, it has it’s place in my life).
- I am also spending money to attend spin class.
- Baby MPB still has an in-house nanny as our temporary nanny is still temporarily with us (thank god).
Fourth, we book the dream vacation! A vacation we were going to take a few years ago which we cancelled due to the ever increasing cost of our international adoption. Clearly Baby MPB is coming with us. So, the adult MPB’s need to realize this trip will be different then pre-baby trips and we will have to slow down and enjoy the world through the eyes of a young child.
I’m so excited!!!
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