The Family Visit

As it turns out, I got the visit with my Aunt (and family) that I was hoping for….because I am too sick to be around the other extended family’s infant so they didn’t visit.  (Truthfully, this made me pretty happy because it meant I’d get time to actually visit with my Aunt family).

So our wonderful weekend visit included:

  • Italian cooking with my Italian Aunt – our freezer is now stocked with homemade meatballs and homemade sauce.
  • Wonderful conversations.
  • Countless hugs with my sweet cousins.
  • 20150524 - 100HappyDays_Day319My Aunt completing my one and only, never to be completed knitting project – a cloth.  And then making more of them with the yarn.
  • A very spoiled Baby MPB.
  • Sharing memories of past visits with my mom and sister.
  • Many wonderful photos for my one photo a day for the first year of Baby MPB’s life photo album.

I don’t know if I ever mentioned this or not, but my Aunt and Uncle completed their family through adoption.  They went through the process many years ago, and my cousins are now teenagers/young adults.  When we were considering adoption as an option for our family, I spoke with my Aunt.  She was very honest with me about their process and the years since.  Their adoption choices and experiences influenced our adoption choices.  And so this weekend we had some very cathartic conversations about the adoption process, the adoption costs, our children’s biological family history, etc.  Mr. MPB and I do not share specific details with family and friends – we are very reserved and fully aware that the details are Baby MPB’s to share one day if he choose to.  So, we always answer questions and/or make statements rather vaguely.  But, one thing we’ve learned is that people in the adoption community have much different conversations – people who have been through the process, understand the details in a very different way.   There is no “amazing person” complex.  There is no defending our choice to adopt.  There is no disrespect aimed at birth parents.  There is no educating about “just adopt” comments.  Rather, within the adoption community we find that the conversations are always respectful and always seem to be about helping one and other learn through our somewhat unique shared experiences.

And so, this past weekend was everything I hoped for (minus still being sick). And, I am already looking forward to our next in-person visit which had better not be another 8+ years from now!

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8 Comments on “The Family Visit

  1. This sounds lovely. I’m so glad that you have family who “get it,” and with whom you can connect about your adoption experience. And I’m glad that this branch of your family is so wholeheartedly fulfilling their responsibility to spoil Baby MPB!

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  2. SO happy your family visit was all you wanted it to be. Your aunt sounds like a very special person. It’s nice to have someone in your family you can talk openly with and who understands. Hopefully you guys can do it again soon!

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  3. I’m so glad that you got the visit you had hoped for, and not a million people in your house. I love that you share such a special bond with your aunt, and that you can be there to share and discuss something so big and personal in your lives. I’m sorry you’re still feeling sick though…you need to kick that funk soon!!
    (ps~I sent you an email the other day, but it was giving me a lot of trouble so if you didn’t get it let me know and I’ll try again!)

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m so glad you had a wonderful visit even though you were sick. It’s nice to have conversations with people who have been there so you don’t feel like you have to spend the majority of your time censoring yourself or filling in the gaps!

    Liked by 1 person

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