When we chose open adoption to have Baby MPB, we realized that we would not get detailed family medical history for our child. We hoped we’d get some, but there is no guarantees about the level of detail or the accuracy. In fact, in the open adoption world where we live, it’s pretty well known that the information we receive can often have gaps and/or be inaccurate. All we get is a basic self-report on information that is known by the birth parents and ultrasound reports if there are any.
(In Baby MPB’s case, I believe we have pretty good medical history and as we are in touch with his birth mom we have the ability to ask more questions if we ever need to. And I’m absolutely grateful for that. But we don’t have everything and there always will be gaps – as I’ve discussed before we aren’t even positive what his racial make-up is).
So, when we contemplate embryo adoption, having the opportunity to find out more reliable details about family medical history and genetics is something we had never considered. This seems to be a trend these days, and it just one more thing for us to think about.
And, honestly knowing intimate details just isn’t something we really care too much about. We already know that our friends are healthy and they have healthy children, what more do we need to know? I guess we also know that their children are some of the cutest and most adorable little kids ever – that’s just a bonus information in our minds!
In a perfect world, I really do want any child we have to know their biological family medical history. Mr. MPB and I don’t care about it, but I suspect once grown a child/adult may want access to this type of information. I also want our children to know their biological families, if possible (more on that another day).
But do Mr. MPB and I need to know more details? I don’t really think so.
At this point in time we haven’t asked our friends any questions related to medical/genetic history, so I honestly don’t know anything. But, I am rather confident they would be willing to share their known family medical history if we asked today or in the future.
If you like this post, please feel free to share and please click the follow button on the side or return to myperfectbreakdown.com to follow my journey.
So, I often spend time with Baby MPB.
We often have just mommy and Baby MPB time. We go swimming. We go to the grocery store together. We go shopping to get things him, things for me and sometimes to get gifts for others in our lives (I’m trying to start Christmas shopping).
We often have mommy and Baby MPB play dates with friends. We go to the zoo with my friends and their kids. We go shopping with friends too. We go for coffee with friends. And sometimes we just go to friends house’s to visit.
Mr. MPB does not do this stuff as frequently as he tends to work more then I do and when he’s not working he tends to play with Baby MPB at home. Yes, sometimes he goes to the grocery story with Baby MPB. But he’s dislikes shopping even more then I do and he doesn’t go on nearly as many friend play dates. And on weekends, we try to do things as a family. So the reality is that I tend to have a bit more one-on-one time with Baby MPB.
.
But then the other day Mr. MPB and Baby MPB went on a play date with a friend and their child to a place we’ve never been before. Mr. MPB planned to leave the house with Baby MPB specifically so that I could work, as I had too many deadlines at the same time and simply not enough time. It was really very considerate.
.
But, as soon as they walked out of the door, I was miserable.
And then the ever considerate Mr. MPB sent me photos of the Baby MPB and his Baby Friend having fun together and I was even more unhappy.
Honestly rather then being happy that they were spending quality time together, I simply hated every single second of their Daddy-Baby time.
Then, I realized what was going on.
I was jealous!
I wanted to go with them.
I wanted to be part of the friend fun time.
I’ll admit some days I like that I work as I like the mental stimulation and social aspects of working (even if I don’t always like my actual career choice). But, on days like this, when my boys are out playing and I’m stuck working, I just hate it.
Sometimes being a working mom just sucks!
If you like this post, please feel free to share and please click the follow button on the side or return to My Perfect Breakdown to follow my journey.
My Perfect Breakdown 