The Working Mom Balance
As an independent consultant my work schedule can have significant fluctuations with some weeks being slower and other weeks being insanely busy. And this last week was one of those busy weeks. In fact, I have been away with work more then I’ve been home in the last week – heck I was even away with work on Saturday. Being gone this much is another first that I’m not happy about. My current work schedule means that I’ve missed multiple bedtimes. I’ve missed multiple mornings wake-ups. And, I’ve missed and all the good stuff that happens in between.
It’s been hard! Really hard in fact.
Practically when I’m working this much it is hard on our family. Mr. MPB is an amazing father, but when he’s the one doing everything he gets worn down and slightly frustrated – which I do understand as I know we each keep score in our own ways. He’s stuck doing everything (except laundry because that’s always my job). Which means while he’s also working full time he also does all the early morning wake ups, all the bed times, all the cooking, all the playing, all the snuggling, etc. And of course, this means when I am around we spend more time arguing, about the inequalities. Which is ironic because I know neither of us want to spend our limited time together arguing, yet we do in large part because we are both so tired.
Emotionally this last week has been unbelievably hard. Simply, I want to be with Little MPB. I want to snuggle him. I want to play with him. I want to read him stories. I want to give him bedtime snuggles. I even want to do the less fun stuff – diapers, early morning wake-ups, etc. Missing all this stuff is hard. And, I feel massive amount of guilt as a result.
And, to be honest, I also miss spending time with Mr. MPB. We usually spend time together with Little MPB as a family. And, just the two of us usually our evenings together once Baby MPB is in bed.
I know all of what I’m saying is not a new concept. Families all of the world have two working parents. Many mom’s including my own, have done this before me and many more will in the future. It’s a hard balancing act to perfect, and honestly I doubt I ever will. But, what I’d love to know is what is the secrete to making it work? How in the world am I supposed to manage my professional life (which I enjoy) and my family life (which I love) without always feeling like I’m coming up short in some respect?
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