It’s official, I now say that Doodle MPB is the biggest mistake of my life.
Now, I also recognize that getting a crazy puppy with a 2 year old is probably not the worst possible mistake people make in their lives. For example, I could have made a decision to start smoking crack-cocaine (or is it inject crack-cocaine? I really don’t know. I’m not experienced in crack-cocaine). Clearly, I could have made a worse decision. So, maybe in the scheme of life, this being my biggest mistake is not the end of the world.
Honestly, we’ve talked very seriously about re-homing her. Both our vet, trainer and amazing dog supporter Belladonna Took and I agree that the only two situations that would arise from re-homing her:
- If we advertise on a public buy and sell site (i.e. craigslist), and am truthful about her personality, the only person who would be willing to take her would be someone running a dog fighting ring (they would probably love to have her for all the wrong reasons). So, this is clearly not an option.
- If we take her to the city pound, she would be adopted immediately because she is just so darn cute. But, it’s just not an option because she’ll either be destined to a life of continual abandonment as people would return her every 3 months due to her crazy or she’ll end up with someone who gets frustrated and ties her up outside all day and basically abandons her. Again, not an option.
(There is a third option, which is actually driving half way across the continent to take Doodle MPB to Belladonna Took, who will take her and find her the right home as she runs a small dog rescue – but that is an absolute last resort, to the point that we are not even considering it. That said, I’m thankful we know we have an out if we truly get to that point).
So, where are we at? Since we refuse to do either of the potential options, it means we adamantly refuse to give up on her. (I will say, a large part of this decision is that while she’s crazy, she is not aggressive. Aggression would be a game changer for us, since we have a toddler in the house.)
But, in the meantime, our vet has determined we have tried everything she can think of and suggested we try medication to help her. So, as of yesterday, Doodle MPB has started what I am calling puppy prozac. In reality it is called Clomicalm.
I asked our vet what to expect, and I loved her description.
We are not trying to change Doodle MPB – she is a lovely dog. We are just trying to take the edge of the crazy.
So, we are trying this for a month. I’m told it will take at least 1 week before we notice any change. And in 30 days, we will either alter the dose or try something else. The thinking right now is that she’ll stay on this for the next year or so, and then we’ll try weaning her off of it. But I am told some animals will need it for life. Only time will tell.
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I am a working mom. I work full time. I run my own consulting company with no-one to provide back-up or coverage. being a one women team means I’m on my own for meetings, so I had better not get sick or have a flat tire because there is no-one else who can step in and pick up my slack from time to time. Being a one person team is interesting. Truthfully, most day’s I love it. Some days, it’s challenging, especially days like today when I’m at my desk before 5am trying to make a 9am deadline. Without support, I simply have no-one to help me in time-crunch situations.
And then there’s days like yesterday…
You see, I didn’t mark an all day / all evening meeting in Mr. MPB’s calendar – somehow I marked the day portion of the meeting, but the not evening portion. And, Mr. MPB, booked an evening meeting for the exact same time, which was odd considering he basically never works in the evening.
Mr. MPB had to be at his meeting. I also had to be at my meeting.
We evaluated every option we could think of including bringing Little MPB to one of our meetings, which we quickly deemed not an option. Neither of us could reschedule our meetings. We couldn’t get a mid-week baby-sitter.
In the end, I did something I never thought possible – at 9am, at the beginning of my meeting, I announced that I would have to leave at 5pm due to evening childcare arrangements falling through.
Some people in the meeting looked genuinely shocked that I’d leave prior to completion of a meeting that had been booked for 2+ months. One person simply said, toddlers takes precedent and with that, the energy in the room shifted and everyone nodded in agreement.
So come 5pm, I packed up my bag, and excused myself from the meeting.
And like that, I did something I never thought I could do. Honestly, I still feel horribly guilty about it, mainly because the mix-up at our house was fully my fault. But, I also don’t regret it, because my toddler does take precedent. Every. Single. Time.
Had I worked for a larger company, it’s likely someone else could have been there in my place. But it’s also likely, I would have been pulled aside and lectured for not having my priorities straight. And you know what, I’m really okay with not having someone lecture me for choosing my family.
In fact, my family is a large part of the reason I work for myself, at all hours of the day.
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My Perfect Breakdown 