The politics in the USA has a tendency to cross the border to Canada. Not in a we get to vote kind of way, but in a media overload kind of way.
So, we read and see all the news. And people here seem pretty obsessed with it all. Heck, I admit in many ways I’ve been obsessed with it all. Well, I was. Since the election results came in last week, I have not read a single news article about the election, the future of USA (and or/the world) as a result, or well anything other then the odd headline that shows up in the news. I just cannot go there as it all upsets me. So I’m avoiding.
But, I digress.
The point of this is the seemingly increasing negative rhetoric surrounding immigration and immigrants that I’ve been noticing lately.
Some people in our lives, who have been overtly racists in the past (although have not said a single racist thing around us since Baby MPB joined our family), have recently been talking about how we need to stop immigration to Canada and stop spending money to support immigrants when they get here. I wont go into details, but needless to say I was appalled for so many reasons.
Then, I realized, after the conversation had passed, that my son is an immigrant! I have no idea why, but I hadn’t really thought about the fact that Baby MPB is an immigrant – of course he is an immigrant, he was born in a different country and we are currently working to get his Canadian citizenship. Holy s@&!, does this mean they think my son should be forced to leave? Next time it comes up in conversation I intend to ask them just that, point blank. Honestly, I expect they will say no, Baby MPB’s different. But that begs the question, why is Baby MPB different? Is Baby MPB different because they claim him as a family member? Is Baby MPB different because he was “fortunate” to be adopted by us and somehow we make it okay? Do they truly think Baby MPB shouldn’t have access to health care and other benefits that our country offers – benefits Mr. MPB and I have fought desperately to get for Baby MPB? Again, questions I intend to ask.
I do not care if these questions make them uncomfortable.
I also don’t know how I will process any of the answers they may give.
I guess, I don’t really know what I expect to happen when this conversation eventually occurs, and I am confident it will one day. And, in some ways, I don’t really know what I expect to get out of putting them on the spot. Yet, for some reason I feel compelled – maybe it’s because I think we deserve to know how they really feel so that we can attempt to protect our son from such hateful comments. But also I think it’s because I’m trying to understand how people can believe this type of thing and by asking the questions maybe I’ll get some insight into a line of thinking that I truly do not understand.
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We are officially a forever family of three.
According to the Government of the USA, our beautiful son is stuck with us and we are beyond ecstatic to be his forever parents.
The paperwork that says we are forever a family arrived this weekend. We even got an official certificate declaring Baby MPB part of the MPB family. I don’t think the certificate has any legal meaning. I’ll admit, I find the certificate really weird, what we are supposed to do with it? Frame it? I think we’ll just add it to the copious amount of adoption paperwork we have and just let it sit there for all eternity for Baby MPB to look at one day if he wants.
.
Honestly, I wont lie, the actual date of the adoption finalization was rather anti-climatic because in our minds we were already a forever family. In fact, the moment I laid my eyes on our son, I knew we’d be a forever family.
As for the actual day, our lawyers forgot to call us to tell us the judge had signed the paperwork and his adoption was final. I did eventually call them at 5pm, because I was starting to worry. (This was oddly reminiscent of the relinquishment period ending when they forgot to call us to confirm that we were through that hurdle). But, I doubt we’ll remember that in 20 years. Instead, I think what we will remember is the tooth coming through that meant we were all exhausted and grumpy – you know, just like every other first time parent with a teething baby. In many ways, this was perfect, because it was just like any other day, as life with a baby should be.
And so, while nothing has changed in our day-to-day life, it does mean it’s time to start doing more paperwork. First up, Canadian Immigration. Followed (in the order I think it will all be done in) by
- Canadian Social Insurance number;
- Amended birth certificate (I still find this odd;
- Canadian passport;
- USA Social Security number; and,
- New USA passport.
Something tells me this will all take at least another year? I think it’s all dependent on Canadian Immigration processing times and the amended birth certificate – both of which I have no idea how long they take to process. Truthfully have no idea, some things will happen concurrently so maybe it will be quicker then I expect? I have no-one to ask for processing times, so this is really just an uneducated guess.
And, so I guess what really matters as we are done with the adoption process. Our USA agency can no longer charge us another surprise penny (we are still waiting for a final invoice, but now we are told it would be illegal for us to pay it as part of the adoption finalization is that the Judge approved our adoption expenses). And so we will no longer face another adoption related bill. And, our USA agency can no longer hold anything over our heads, we are forever free of them.
So, really, the adoption finalization means that we can just focus on living and raising our son. And that is pretty darn amazing!
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