Light Blub Moment
I just figured out why parents have kids 1.5 years to 2 years apart in age.
And, I know get why people who have struggled with infertility knowingly sign up to fight so hard for a second child, even though they already have one.
As I watch Little MPB playing, it’s like all the sudden I truly get the intense draw to fight hard for that second child. Where he is developmentally now as a two year old, I would totally sign up for infant sleepless nights again! Little MPB can play independently for short periods of time; he can tell us what he wants, when he wants it; and, he sleeps through the night mostly. He’s sort of past needing us, in the way that an infant does (don’t get me wrong, at 2 years old he still needs his parents, but it’s just not the same). And with every passing day he is becoming more and more a little boy, and less and less of a toddler and long gone are the baby days. And even with all the hard things that come along with becoming a parent, it’s been such an amazing experience that I would do it all over again in a heart be.
Somehow, an infant doesn’t seem so scary or daunting right now. In fact, some how an infant seems completely do-able and dare I say, manageable.
But alas, Mr. MPB and I have no intentions to grow our family. Months ago we came to the decision that we are one and done – this stance has not changed. We know that trying for a second child the traditional way is simply out of the cards for us. We know we aren’t willing to use a surrogate or a gestational carrier. And, we’ve decided we cannot emotionally or financially go through through the adoption process again. Barring some sort of child falling out of the air and into our arms, we truly believe we are done.
But my gosh, I would love to have another one so that I could soak up all those little baby snuggles!
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