Light Blub Moment

I just figured out why parents have kids 1.5 years to 2 years apart in age.

And, I know get why people who have struggled with infertility knowingly sign up to fight so hard for a second child, even though they already have one.

As I watch Little MPB playing, it’s like all the sudden I truly get the intense draw to fight hard for that second child.  Where he is developmentally now as a two year old, I would totally sign up for infant sleepless nights again!  Little MPB can play independently for short periods of time; he can tell us what he wants, when he wants it; and, he sleeps through the night mostly.  He’s sort of past needing us, in the way that an infant does (don’t get me wrong, at 2 years old he still needs his parents, but it’s just not the same).  And with every passing day he is becoming more and more a little boy, and less and less of a toddler and long gone are the baby days.  And even with all the hard things that come along with becoming a parent, it’s been such an amazing experience that I would do it all over again in a heart be.

Somehow, an infant doesn’t seem so scary or daunting right now.  In fact, some how an infant seems completely do-able and dare I say, manageable.

It’s like a light bulb went on in my head.  I just get it.  I fully understand and respect why people would sign up to go through infertility/loss hell again for the chance of having a second child.

But alas, Mr. MPB and I have no intentions to grow our family.  Months ago we came to the decision that we are one and done – this stance has not changed.  We know that trying for a second child the traditional way is simply out of the cards for us.  We know we aren’t willing to use a surrogate or a gestational carrier.  And, we’ve decided we cannot emotionally or financially go through through the adoption process again.  Barring some sort of child falling out of the air and into our arms, we truly believe we are done.

But my gosh, I would love to have another one so that I could soak up all those little baby snuggles!

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8 Comments on “Light Blub Moment

  1. I total have understood that fact lately as well. Maybe that is what is finally making me feel okay with wanting a second kiddo. Once they turn two then you start losing all the last of the babyness. Goodbye diapers, crib, binky, needing help with dressing, etc. They just grow up overnight.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. “Somehow, an infant doesn’t seem so scary or daunting right now. In fact, somehow an infant seems completely do-able and dare I say, manageable.” I needed to hear this. One of my OBs made a full stop date for this pregnancy yesterday, and it’s starting to feel scary real….like we could actually have a baby at the end of this thing come home. And the house isn’t ready, and I’m not ready, and and and….
    Also, you can always make the trip down here to snuggle with my baby if you want. 🙂

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  3. I’m starting to feel the same way. But I keep imagining trying to care for and feed a baby while Baby Bach has climbed up onto something (fireplace, back of the couch…. ceiling fan…. who knows) and I get overwhelmed pretty easy! You have a little climber too right? I’m just realizing that not all kids are like this! Just the ones that want to give their parents hell!!! LOL

    That being said, if a baby falls out of the sky and into my lap, I’ll give you a call!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I think about this sometimes… it would be manageable right now (as manageable as an infant can be, anyway). It feels good that I can finally sit here and confidently say NOPE. Just because I could doesn’t mean I need/want to.

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  5. Honestly sometimes they just come that way. We adopted a sibling set and there were two close in age and then one much older. It was sort of a package deal. But yes I can only imagine the baby fever. ❤️

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