Changes Are Coming
The work day is almost done. Play time with my favourite little boy is about to start. I should be using these last minutes to catch up on my backlog of client emails, instead I’m sitting here listening with tears welling up in my eyes.
I can hear my son laughing and giggling from the other room as he plays with his Nanny. Normally, this brings so much joy to my heart.
Today, not so much.
In mere moments, we are letting our nanny know that we put Baby MPB on a daycare waitlist. And, a spot become available much sooner then we anticipated. We had 24 hours to claim the sport or it would be given to another family. We made our decision and Baby MPB is officially enrolled to begin daycare in about a month. Much, much, much earlier then we had anticipated.
I firmly believe we are making the right decision to put Baby MPB in daycare. I know in my heart, this is best for him. He will be exposed to other children his age and he will receive age appropriate education on a daily basis. As an only child I firmly believe he needs this type of social interaction. And, I will admit that moving from a private nanny to a daycare will make a substantial difference to our family’s income, a fact that we could not overlook as we continue to pay off the debt associated with his adoption.
I have many emotions surrounding this decision, mostly about me not being ready to let him go, but today my mind is caught up in the fact that this transition means we have to let our son’s nanny go. I have not-so-secretly been hoping that she would get a job and leave us so that we wouldn’t have to let her go. I like her, she’s a sweet girl with such a bright future. We are giving her as much notice as we possibly can, yet I still feel horrible letting her go.
With the exception of Mr. MPB and I, our son has spent more time with her in his life then with anyone else. She has played a huge role in his life thus far. She is literally his best friend and I know he’ll be sad not to spend his days playing with her. Heck, even our dog loves the nanny and will be sad when she no longer visits. And, it goes without say that Mr. MPB and I will miss her as well, she’s been such a critical part of our family for the last 8 months.
But more then anything I will miss having Baby MPB at home during the day. I will no longer be able to listen to him giggle and laugh as I work. I will no longer be able check in and get a Baby MPB hug and snuggle whenever I want. I will no longer know how he naps or how he eats, or how he is feeling at any point during the day. We will no longer have the ease of having his nanny come to our home daily. Our son will no longer receive one-on-one care.
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