Changes Are Coming
The work day is almost done. Play time with my favourite little boy is about to start. I should be using these last minutes to catch up on my backlog of client emails, instead I’m sitting here listening with tears welling up in my eyes.
I can hear my son laughing and giggling from the other room as he plays with his Nanny. Normally, this brings so much joy to my heart.
Today, not so much.
In mere moments, we are letting our nanny know that we put Baby MPB on a daycare waitlist. And, a spot become available much sooner then we anticipated. We had 24 hours to claim the sport or it would be given to another family. We made our decision and Baby MPB is officially enrolled to begin daycare in about a month. Much, much, much earlier then we had anticipated.
I firmly believe we are making the right decision to put Baby MPB in daycare. I know in my heart, this is best for him. He will be exposed to other children his age and he will receive age appropriate education on a daily basis. As an only child I firmly believe he needs this type of social interaction. And, I will admit that moving from a private nanny to a daycare will make a substantial difference to our family’s income, a fact that we could not overlook as we continue to pay off the debt associated with his adoption.
I have many emotions surrounding this decision, mostly about me not being ready to let him go, but today my mind is caught up in the fact that this transition means we have to let our son’s nanny go. I have not-so-secretly been hoping that she would get a job and leave us so that we wouldn’t have to let her go. I like her, she’s a sweet girl with such a bright future. We are giving her as much notice as we possibly can, yet I still feel horrible letting her go.
With the exception of Mr. MPB and I, our son has spent more time with her in his life then with anyone else. She has played a huge role in his life thus far. She is literally his best friend and I know he’ll be sad not to spend his days playing with her. Heck, even our dog loves the nanny and will be sad when she no longer visits. And, it goes without say that Mr. MPB and I will miss her as well, she’s been such a critical part of our family for the last 8 months.
But more then anything I will miss having Baby MPB at home during the day. I will no longer be able to listen to him giggle and laugh as I work. I will no longer be able check in and get a Baby MPB hug and snuggle whenever I want. I will no longer know how he naps or how he eats, or how he is feeling at any point during the day. We will no longer have the ease of having his nanny come to our home daily. Our son will no longer receive one-on-one care.
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Please do not let the nanny go for at least 1 month of baby MPB in daycare. Kids do not adjust easily to daycare at that age (around 1 year old), you will need to stagger him, with increasing hours at daycare. It took A (at 11 months), 2 full months to adjust to daycare completely.
Also, the first month, I bombarded the daycare with questions, (is he eating, is he sleeping, is it him I hear crying in the background? did he poop? ) :)) They expect it, so let telephone etiquette’s go to hell and call them as often as you want..
I see a whole lot of changes in A , compared to G at the same age. G didn’t start daycare till almost 2.5 years and A is much more social and happy than G at the same age.
I am positive that your nanny will be gracious about this transition. Charlotte was about Baby MPBs age when I realized how good daycare would be for her versus being home with our nanny all day. We aren’t going to pull the nanny plug until this summer, but only because the day care/preschool we fell in love with doesn’t take kids until they’re 2. Otherwise we’d have done it by now. You’ve got this. Baby MPB will thrive and you’ll be more productive–it’s a win for everyone!
Remember when you were having such a hard time finding and keeping a nanny? It’s great to read that your current nanny has become such a valued member of your family.
Change is the nature of the job for nannies, so I’m sure that she will be equipped to handle it. You are thoughtful to give her lots of notice.
I know this is a hard decision that you guys have had to make. If there is one thing I’ve learned from parenting it’s that these tough decisions come up more often than not. I know the change will bring about worry but I have a feeling you guys will be pleased with your decision come March.
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You already know how I feel about the situation but I know how hard it is to let that special member of your family go. I hope that she will stay in touch with you all. I know I was with my family for 10 years vs 8 months but they are a major part of our lives and are considered family.
This is though. I’m sending you strength and love. I do like what mamalife said above. Makes sense of you can swing it.