I am a Canadian citizens, and therefore I have no legal right to have an opinion on the USA political scene. But, truthfully, I’ve always had an opinion. How can I not? Canadian media is inundated with USA politics, USA television shows, USA sports and USA news. And, I’m generally pretty opinionated anyways.
But in the last few months, my opinion on the USA political arena seems to matter to much more to me then it ever did before. Now, as the mother to a child who is a dual citizen of Canada and USA, I am deeply tied to the happenings of my neighbour to the south.
As my son is an American citizen, I feel deeply connected to USA politics. As I am not a USA citizen I will never have a right to vote in the USA, but when my son is old enough, he will have that right. (As an aside, I do vote in every election in Canada. I believe it is a democratic right that I will always exercise). So, I’m watching very closely from the sidelines and now I find myself:
- Paying more attention to USA politics and upcoming election then I ever have before. (Mind you, it’s hard to ignore Trump no matter how hard I try).
- Feeling deeply invested in the USA, in a way that I didn’t realize I would be. I desperately want my son to be a citizen of two countries that value and respect all human life.
- Not so secretly hoping the USA doesn’t turn its back on the very foundation of a democratic country that values equality.
The one thing I know is that no matter the outcome of the upcoming USA election, my son will be brought up to value democracy as a basic human right. My son will learn about both Canada and USA. He will learn about both counties histories, past leaders, and great thinkers. He will learn about their respective successes and failures.
But even more, my son will be brought up learning about compassion and tolerance. He will learn about respect and love.
Hate and fear mongering will not be part of our lives. I simply wont live that way.
While my son has no ability to vote in either country right now (he is just an infant after all), he will one day. He is in a unique position where he can help positively influence the paths of two amazing counties, and I will encourage him to do so.
And so in what is quite possibly a very Canadian statement, no matter how he chooses to vote, my son will be brought up knowing the power of sunny ways*, and the power of positivity.
* Sunny ways is a term used by Sir Wilfrid Laurier in approximately 1896 and Justin Trodeau in 2015 in respect to overcoming differences by coming together.
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Aas many of you know, I never had a traditional baby shower. Instead, the following three things have happened in the in the last few months:
- Once we announced our decision to adopt, I had one friend say she’s throw us and baby a shower when the time was right. I politely said, we’ll see as it’s just too early for me to even contemplate a shower. I’ve never heard anything else (nor have I asked).
- Once baby was part of our lives, my sister-in-law, said to me while we were still in the USA I’m going to talk with your step-mom, you have to have a baby shower as soon as you are home!! You and Baby MPB deserve to be celebrated just like everyone else. I nearly cried at her thoughtfulness and, I politely responded with don’t worry about it. She wouldn’t help with my wedding shower, so I don’t expect anything for our son either. As nothing has happened since I can only assume my step-mom declined to help or my sister-in-law chose not to pursue it based on my comment (which I understand).
- Mr. MPB’s mother helped throw his siblings wife’s baby shower back in the summer. She actually helped put it on – organized invitations and RSVPs, travelled to be there, decorated, and bought food. No baby shower has been mentioned for us. Nothing, not a word.
I wont lie, I am bitter that our family has not done any sort of baby shower to celebrate our child. I’m once again disappointed in our family.
Truthfully, I’m disappointed in my side of the family, but not surprised in the least.
And honestly, I’ve turned an ugly shade of green as I think of my mother-in-law supporting her other son’s wife and child but not ours. I’ve been both jealous and bitter at the difference in how she’s treated the celebration of both her grandchildren joining our family just months apart. I can’t help but wonder, is it because she favours one of her son’s over the other? or a favourite wife? Or is it because Baby MPB is adopted? I truthfully hope it has more to do with her favourite son then Baby MPB. It breaks my heart to even think that it could have anything to do with adoption and/or to do with Baby MPB. Or better yet, maybe she’s just clueless?
And so, while I’m bitter and annoyed with our families, I have been making a conscious effort not to think about this. Instead, I choose to focus on how thankful I am for the love that we have received. I may not have a real baby shower, but I did have an amazing blogging community baby shower, which still brings tears to my eyes as I recall all the kindness and love that we received and the practical support in helping us prepare for our little guy. More then anything, I’m thankful that my little family has experienced so much love from throughout the world. I’m thankful that no-matter where Baby MPB chooses to go in his life, he will probably know someone who has loved him from afar before he even existed. I am so excited to tell him all about you all and share the story of his modern day baby shower with him.
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My Perfect Breakdown 