Aas many of you know, I never had a traditional baby shower. Instead, the following three things have happened in the in the last few months:
- Once we announced our decision to adopt, I had one friend say she’s throw us and baby a shower when the time was right. I politely said, we’ll see as it’s just too early for me to even contemplate a shower. I’ve never heard anything else (nor have I asked).
- Once baby was part of our lives, my sister-in-law, said to me while we were still in the USA I’m going to talk with your step-mom, you have to have a baby shower as soon as you are home!! You and Baby MPB deserve to be celebrated just like everyone else. I nearly cried at her thoughtfulness and, I politely responded with don’t worry about it. She wouldn’t help with my wedding shower, so I don’t expect anything for our son either. As nothing has happened since I can only assume my step-mom declined to help or my sister-in-law chose not to pursue it based on my comment (which I understand).
- Mr. MPB’s mother helped throw his siblings wife’s baby shower back in the summer. She actually helped put it on – organized invitations and RSVPs, travelled to be there, decorated, and bought food. No baby shower has been mentioned for us. Nothing, not a word.
I wont lie, I am bitter that our family has not done any sort of baby shower to celebrate our child. I’m once again disappointed in our family.
Truthfully, I’m disappointed in my side of the family, but not surprised in the least.
And honestly, I’ve turned an ugly shade of green as I think of my mother-in-law supporting her other son’s wife and child but not ours. I’ve been both jealous and bitter at the difference in how she’s treated the celebration of both her grandchildren joining our family just months apart. I can’t help but wonder, is it because she favours one of her son’s over the other? or a favourite wife? Or is it because Baby MPB is adopted? I truthfully hope it has more to do with her favourite son then Baby MPB. It breaks my heart to even think that it could have anything to do with adoption and/or to do with Baby MPB. Or better yet, maybe she’s just clueless?
And so, while I’m bitter and annoyed with our families, I have been making a conscious effort not to think about this. Instead, I choose to focus on how thankful I am for the love that we have received. I may not have a real baby shower, but I did have an amazing blogging community baby shower, which still brings tears to my eyes as I recall all the kindness and love that we received and the practical support in helping us prepare for our little guy. More then anything, I’m thankful that my little family has experienced so much love from throughout the world. I’m thankful that no-matter where Baby MPB chooses to go in his life, he will probably know someone who has loved him from afar before he even existed. I am so excited to tell him all about you all and share the story of his modern day baby shower with him.
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