It’s that time of year again, influenza vaccination time (more commonly known as flu shot time).
Baby MPB was not protected against influenza last year as he wasn’t born in time to have the shot, was too young to get it and his birth mother did not get it while she was pregnant. So, last year, we took every precaution practical to keep Baby MPB away from anyone who wasn’t vaccinated.
For us, vaccinations are a simple decision.
So after Baby MPB was born, our rule was simple: No matter who you are, if you don’t have your flu shot, you are not welcome to visit until Baby MPB turns 6 months old and can get his own vaccination.
This meant massive arguments with some family members. Which at the time I was horribly disappointed by, and truthfully still am. I just cannot understand why they wouldn’t want to help protect our child (and their grandchild). And I do realize at some point I should probably just get over it (and I was over it until I read my post from last year when family members refused to get vaccinated). Anyways, I’m starting to go on a tangent/rant. That’s not the point, at least not today’s point.
The point is, now that Baby MPB is old enough we are doing what we can to protect him. Mr. MPB and I stopped working early (well, I am still not really working as I’m still sick) and we went to get our vaccinations. We stood dutifully in line, then we all got our shots and waited for a full 15 minutes to make sure there were no immediate reactions. I must say, I handled it the best – shots just don’t bother me and never have. While we get our shots every year, Mr. MPB and I haven’t always gone together and when we have it turns out I’ve never paid much attention before – Mr. MPB really doesn’t like needles. He toughs it out, but clearly he’s not a fan. And Baby MPB, he was playing with the nurse and having a great time until she jabbed him, then all bets were off as the crocodile tears rolled down his cheeks. Clearly he was no longer her friend.
But we all survived and so far we are all reaction free.
And so this year, I’m relieved to know that Baby MPB has his vaccination – he should be protected. Honestly, I’m also relieved to know that we aren’t begging/arguing with people to get their vaccinations to protect our child.
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This is one is pretty simple for Mr. MPB and I, but it’s also pretty critical.
When we did all our adoption research we decided to pursue an open adoption because the most up-to-date research indicated that it’s best for children to know they are adopted from the beginning and for children to know their biological family. (If you really want sources for this info, let me know and I can try to dig them up).
So, just like with Baby MPB we would want our potential embryo adopted child to also know their biological family. Which means, we want our child (and us) to have a relationship with our friends. (And honestly, since they are already friends, it would seem weird to not have a relationship with them).
I should say that we understand that it may not be possible to have relationships with all of our children(s) biological family members. We know this is always a possibility, but ideally we would want some sort of connection.
Photo Source: Office.com Clip Art
We don’t have a crystal ball for what this relationship would look like through the years (because really, how could we?). But, in our minds, this would be similar to what our open adoption is like. Photos, emails, and texts are sent both ways. And visits will also happen. When it comes to Baby MPB’s open adoption we don’t have a set schedule of communication, we just ebb and flow. For example, so far with Baby MPB photos/emails/texts are sent when we have time – sometimes a few a week, and other times a few a month. And visits will happen when we have the money and time to travel and it works for Baby MPB’s birth mother too.
We know this relationships wouldn’t be the same as Baby MPB’s open adoption relationships, because let’s be honest, no two relationships are identical. But, we would want to know that there would be a possibility of a relationship.
The way we look at it, our family is never going to be conventional – we have a beautiful son through open adoption and we view his biological family as part of our extended family. And, if we do this, we figure our extended family would also grow again.
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