After navigating international adoption I am pretty used to filling in forms. I’m rather proficient at filling them in, and I am also pretty darn good at it. Not to jinx myself, but I’m yet to fill one out incorrectly and have it rejected by any sort of government, agency or lawyer.
But, then we were asked to fill out some forms for daycare. And I’m procrastinated like there is no tomorrow.
You see, the ask an open ended question that I am struggling with answering:
Please tell us any additional important information about your child.
At first I couldn’t think of anything. Little MPB is a pretty relaxed and happy little guy. He does not have allergies. He does not have any illnesses.
But then I realized, he’s adopted!
Is that the type of important information they want to know? And, should we tell them at this point in time?
As I’ve stated countless times, his adoption is absolutely not a secrete. But, we also don’t want him to wear a sign that says I’m adopted. Unless of course he wants to wear a sign that says he’s adopted, then we are all for it. But at this point in time, we have to make that decision for him. And by filling in this form stating that he’s adopted we are automatically marking him with this information.
We realize that at this age, it’s pretty inconsequential to Little MPB as the daycare already teaches about diverse families. But what about forms when he starts kindergarten, or hockey or any other sort of organized program. Do we share this on his behalf when it wont really make a difference to the programming?
At some point we need to hand the form in and so we want to think through our approach to these forms in the future too. At this point we are leaning towards sharing the information if it will make a difference to helping ensure the program is respectful of our family. But if it wont make a difference (i.e. sports) just leaving it out. And, as he ages, we will ask his input on how/if he wants to tell others.
If you like this post, please feel free to share and please click the follow button on the side or return to myperfectbreakdown.com to follow my journey.