Relinquishment Anxiety

So, we got yet another surprise in terms of adoption process that I haven’t yet mentioned and that we weren’t prepared for.

When all the paperwork was signed by myself, my husband, our birth mother, our social worker, etc. and we found out that the immediate relinquishment waiver is not in fact effective immediately upon signing. But rather it becomes effective at the end of the next business day. For us, with how the dates have worked out, this means we have to wait through the weekend. We’ve made it through Saturday already, just a few more days.

Please note that I 100% respect the birth mother’s choice to change her mind and I cannot even begin to imagine her emotions around, but this post is not about that.

Rather, this post is about my anxiety as an adoptive mom.

We have a son. We have been caring for our son. We’ve been with him since just moments after his birth, we love him with every ounce of our beings. He has literally spent every single moment with us since we left the hospital and spent our first (very sleepless night) together as a family in our hotel.

He is our son.

No matter what happens over this weekend, he will always be my son in my heart.  No matter what.

The bond we have already, the love in my heart, nothing will ever change that.

And I simply cannot imagine having to give him back.  I honestly don’t know how we will get through that, should it happen.  Just even discussing the possibility breaks my heart and brings tears to my eyes.

So, now we just have to find a way to get through the next few days without driving ourselves too insane with constant fear!

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20 Comments on “Relinquishment Anxiety

  1. Oh Honey, I am sure your anxiety is through the roof right now. I can only image how you and Mr. MPB must feel. I know thinking about L reunifying with her BM completely fills me with anxiety and I knew that was the goal from the beginning (doesn’t mean I have to like it though, lol).

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  2. You are in the home stretch now and Angels in Heaven are guiding you through. Just a few more days and you can take your beautiful baby home and call the photographers to come take adorable infant photos and family photos ! You are covered in prayer by each one of us and we are elated for you! ! Xoxo

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  3. I was wondering if you were “in the clear yet” I’m hoping things go smoothly! Hearing about the first night with your son gives me chills and warms my heart!

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  4. Having done foster care adoption, I sympathize. I had to wait 22 mos to finalize the adoption of my youngest, feeling fear the whole time. My older son took more than 3 yrs to finalize. The fear with him wasn’t as great given his was a different situation, but it was still there sometimes.
    I hope things work out, and that all of you (birthmom included) can find peace in these few days. Good luck!

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  5. I haven’t commented yet because I’m at a loss. I am nervous for you. But not because I think she’ll change her mind, but because this is a situation that would make me very nervous if it were me. I think you’ve got a pretty confident birth mom in her decision, but the added days are hard… Even though I think more states need longer time for moms to really decide. But now that it’s you, and not adoption in general, I want that waiting period to be over! ❤

    How did the visit with her go? I hope it was nice. 😊

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  6. I cannot imagine your anxiety. I hope the time passes quickly and you, Mr. MPB and baby MPB are headed north very soon!! I can’t wait to hear about your experiences as a mommy!!!

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  7. Logged on specially to check up on you. It’s Monday here, so today is the day. Sending you such big hugs, and tears of happiness (yes, you horrible thing, you made me sniffle!) and … oh, so looking forward to send you actual YES IT’S DONE congratulations!

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