The Control Freak In Me
I love to be in control of EVERYTHING.
And i mean everything.
Recurrent pregnancy loss should have taught me that I’m not.
The adoption process should have taught me that I’m not.
Should Have, Would Have, Could Have. Right?
Well it turns out, the control freak in me still exists. And today it’s clamoring to get out.
Please, just tell me when we will be matched. Normal families get about 9 months notification of their children’s arrival. Normal families get to have a schedule.
I’d also really like to know what state we will be matched in! I want to be able to research and understand the legalities of the state. I want to be able to plan our travel (yes, I don’t even have dates but I can map out the best travel options).
And since I’m asking/whining today, please world, can you make sure we don’t face the unpredictability of a failed adoption?! Seriously, we just don’t need to even go there.
Let’s face it, I just want a schedule!
Honestly, a detailed Gantt chart would be ideal, outline key dates and roles and responsibilities. That way we can plan, coordinate and track everything – simple things like needing a sitter for the dog, and less simple things like coordinating the international adoption of a little human.
I really just want the sense of security offered by a predictable schedule. Even if it really is just a false sense of security.
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