Mr. MPB and I recently spent a very quick night in the city we met and completed our first university degrees. In fact, we were there for a mere 16 hours. But, 16 hours is more than enough time to take a trip down memory lane as this city is wrapped up in so many happy memories for us.
We met in our university residence.
I stole his keys.
We consumed way too much alcohol together with our friends.
We went to classes. (Sometimes).
We fell in love.
We moved in together.
We learned to live together.
We went to more classes. (Regularly)
We studied together.
We attended more then a few keg parties together.
We passed and we failed classes together. (Mostly passed).
We applied to graduate schools together.
We packed up our first apartment together.
We moved to a new city together to continue our education and our love story.
As we reminisced, we got to thinking about why we love that city so much. (That said, don’t get me wrong as we both have no intentions of moving back – it’s way to freaking cold there).
It turns out, we love the city for a few reasons.
It has one of the most amazing natural river valleys running through the city. We used to spend multiple hours a week running in the pathway system, and we there is nothing in our new city that even compares to the natural beauty found there.
The City also has a very vibrant street that we lived on with amazing restaurants and bars. The street was busy and active 24 hours a day, and we loved it! It was the perfect place to live as a student.
We loved our carefree university life. While we thought life was stressful at the time, we now know that it was not. Life was pretty easy – we were just responsible for passing our classes and working during the summers. Yes studying for exams is stressful, but in hindsight, it was a much different type of stress then what we are dealing with now partially because we were pretty smart and were usually worrying about the difference between an A and an A- (which is something that to this day I would worry about – I have this need to be perfect). We weren’t worried about our finances, because we lived pretty cheaply and ultimately we knew we’d be okay and our parents would help us if we did something completely stupid with our money (which we never did, except maybe the purchase of our first flat screen TV when we really should have used that scholarship money for books or tuition or even rent. That probably wasn’t the wisest decision we ever made). We loved our friends, and we always had a good time just the two of us or when we were out with everyone. Honestly, part of the ease was that we just weren’t challenged in our personal lives – we just fit together really well and were generally really happy together. In fact, I suspect neither of us can remember if we even argued much let alone what we would have argued over. Life was simply easy.
So to reminisce about our time in this city is to think about happy memories. I’m sure it wasn’t perfect, yet; all we seem to remember are the happy moments. Neither of us remember difficult conversations – There was no real talk like how to pay a mortgage on one income. No talk of what if we cannot have kids when we eventually start trying. No talk of how to balance stressful jobs that require 100% of our efforts for us to be good. No talk of how negotiate the medical system to get the care we require. No talk of how to argue in a way that will help us stay married and in love. There was no talking with psychologists/counsellors regularly to try to survive five miscarriages! There were no meetings with the local adoption agency as we try to figure out how to build a family in the unconventional way.
Looking back, we both realize that somehow time has changed so many things in our lives. Suddenly we have become adults, we have been faced with so many more significant life altering decisions as the years have gone on. We bought and sold our first house; we adopted our dog; we bought and moved into our forever family home; we bought and sold multiple vehicles; we’ve made desperately difficult parenting decisions; and yet one thing has never changed – we love each other to the moon and back.
I know, our young love continues to exist below all of the layers of adulthood responsibilities. Our love may not be as innocent as it once was, but it has grown into a mature love based in so much more than just infatuation with each other (although thankfully there is still some infatuation left). Our love is so much more today, and for that I am thankful. Our love is based in respect for each other and the decisions we have made together as a couple. Our love is based in finding compromises, and supporting each other through our darkest days. Our struggles to grow our family have only strengthened our love, as we have proven that through anything we will be there for each other. Through all the good times and all the recent hard times, there is something that reaches deep inside me that makes me profoundly happy that Mr. MPB chose to spend his life with me.
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