So I Called The Adoption Agency

As promised (see post here) we made the call. It was interesting.

I called and then reported back to my husband.

First impressions:

  • I felt as though they didn’t really want to meet with us, rather they wanted me to read their website. Clearly, I’ve read every single word on their website. I’ve probably read every single word at least 4 or 5 times in the last year! Maybe, we are atypical in that contacting the adoption agency was a very late step in our process?
  • I felt compelled to explain that we’ve read the website, and have met with other adoptive parents who have used their organization and that we are really looking for more information as we work to decide if we want to adopt. We are wanting to know more about how there organization works, what our adoption options are, etc. We want to know more than just what is available online. Once I explained this, she did seem to warm up to me.
  • She suggested we arrange an information meeting with one of the social workers and then potentially attend one of the weekend seminars. She mentioned that some people go into the seminar knowing that adoption is for them, and others go into undecided. Either way is completely fine. This was reassuring and nice to hear both because this statement acknowledged my comment about being unsure if adoption is for us, and because it gave us an idea of what our next steps are if we choose to continue to investigate adoption.
  • The social worker I talked to didn’t sound like the brightest person in the world which annoyed me. We will be meeting with her, so hopefully my first impression is not accurate because it will drive us nuts to talk to someone who we don’t really like.

So, the next steps are an information meeting with a social worker and then a weekend seminar should we chose to attend one. They are offered once every few months in our city.

It will definitely be interesting to see where this leads.

We want to give the option of adoption fair chance, and in order to do that we must not be controlled by our fears. So, as we take the next step we are committing ourselves to being open to possibilities.

If you like this post, please feel free to share it and please return to myperfectbreakdown.com to follow my journey.

20 Comments on “So I Called The Adoption Agency

  1. As an adoptive parent, I am thrilled that you are considering adoption. I also know how very important it is to feel comfortable with the agency. Even though I had a strong feeling about this one agency I found, we went to meetings at two others to make sure. We were “shopping” for a good fit, in terms of likeability of the staff and what programs they work with. (We were undecided at that time about national or international and this was about 7 years ago when things were vastly diff. in lots of countries.) My point is, trust your instincts about the agency. I equate working with the adoption personnel just as important as having a good doctor you trust and are comfortable with delivering your child. There are many agencies out there to choose from. I wish you luck and I know you are simply exploring right now. I respect that. Just wanted to put my two cents experience in here.

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    • Thanks so much! I really like your analogy about the adoption agency. The disappointment this here is that we actually have a very limited number of agencies to choose between. And one of them, the one we are talking with does 90% of the adoptions in our province. So, we had really better like them because they are our best option.
      If you don’t mind me asking, how did you decide between international or national/domestic? This is another thing we are undecided on.

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  2. Great to see you two exploring this option further notwithstanding your fears. Wishing you peace, patience and perseverance on this leg of your journey (because as important as they are, I know they’re not always easy to come by as a threesome!).

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    • Exciting and scary. We are definitely excited to see what we think after our first meeting. I’ll be sure to update the blogging world with the results. 🙂

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  3. I can’t wait to hear how your appointment goes and how the weekend seminar goes! It’s unfortunately that the social worker wasn’t the friendliest person. Hopefully she’ll be easier to talk to in person and I hope the information you take home from this will help you work through this decision.

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  4. I have been looking at this option myself recently, pouring over as much information as I can find and being rather surprised that in a country that is supposedly as “together” as Australia it takes an average of 4-7 years for people to adopt a child. This kind of freaked me out.
    Have you decided on whether you are aiming for domestic or overseas adoption as yet? I am open to a child from wherever the Universe chooses to send them from 🙂 I found a lovely place in China that has children waiting that apparently averages about a year. There you are classified as a special needs child if you have any medical condition, for children that need surgery they raise the money for the surgeries and then place the children with families. Unfortunately Hubby is not ready to walk that road with me yet… I did point out to him that adopting did not mean we could not have our own children too, but he is not at the same point that I am and that is okay.
    I would love to hear how the meeting goes, good luck 🙂

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    • The way you describe the differing processes that your husband and you are taking to investigate adoption is nearly identical to us. I started reading and pouring over information much earlier then him. My husband has taken more time to accept that this might be the only option for us, and now that he has gotten there, I think he might be more open to adopting then I am! I am still coordinating meetings and reading more then he is, but I think he’s less afraid of adoption now then me. Either way, we have not made any decisions and are really unsure about what we will do. We don’t even know if we will proceed with domestic or international should we decide to adopt – both seem to have pros and cons.
      It has been a really interesting process to watch how we both feel about adoption, and how we both change our minds frequently. So, I’m sure it will continue to be interesting over the next few months/years as we make some decisions.
      I’ll definitely keep posting on the subject, because I think our experience should be shared with others just like you who might consider adoption.

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  5. In our situation, the social worker that we worked through was quite overloaded. While I didn’t want to be overbearing, I wanted her to know that I was both a) understanding/supportive and b) not going to fade into the background (in other words, I was going to be quite proactive). Best wishes to you on your journey…and on surviving the wait! http://nineyearpregnancy.wordpress.com/2012/05/02/7-tips-for-the-adoption-journey/surviving-the-wait.
    Blessings,
    Delana

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    • Thanks for sharing your experience! I greatly appreciate learning from anyone who has adopted and who has made it through the adoption process. I particularly like to hear good stories, because lately I’m finding the adoption world is so full of bad stories. 🙂

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  6. Pingback: We Met With the Adoption Agency | My Perfect Breakdown

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