I usually love February, for me it signalizes the very early start of spring as the days start to get a little bit longer, which always makes me happy.

But, clearly 2019, February included, has not bee ideal. Honestly, my anxiety and stress levels are generally high every single day. But, I also realize how important it is not to lose site of life and be brought down by the ongoing negative events in our lives. Knowing that these things are out of my control, I am trying to focus on what I can control in my spare time.

So, I’ve been cooking. Mr. MPB typically does most of our cooking, but he doesn’t have the time and hasn’t had any interest. So, I’m now doing all out cooking. In fact, I am making fruit, spinach/kale and flax smoothies every single morning for all three of us. And, I am also cooking 5-6 suppers a week. If I know one thing about stress, it’s that eating healthy is important. So, I’m making sure that our family is eating fresh, healthy meals.

I have basically forced Mr. MPB get a medical. Given the severity of his family member’s medical situation, he now has very significant family medical history that needed to be reviewed with a doctor. And so, he is having more blood work and medical testing done then he has ever had in his life. He doesn’t particularly love doing it all, in fact, his comment was that it feels like he’s taking a perfectly functioning car to the mechanic asking them to find a problem. But, I can honestly say I gave him no choice in the matter as Little MPB and I expect to have him around for the long run. And, I assured him that he’d rather have the right testing done early, rather then waiting until it is too late.

I also have quit online shopping. This one may sound silly, but Mr. MPB and I have seriously given up amazon and ebay and any other form of online shopping for the month of February. I decided we spend too much money shopping online, because it’s easy. So, this month, if we want anything, we have to actually go to a store to buy it. Which means, some things, like books, are slightly more expensive in person but the effort to go get them means we actually really want them. I think in the end spending a dollar or two more on a book versus buying multiple books out of convenience online is a better financial decision.

And, I’ve rekindled my love for reading. I’ve always loved to read books, but in the last few years I just haven’t had time. In fact, in 2018, I managed to read only 1 book and in 2017 I don’t think I read any. Well, this year, I’ve read 4 books so far – 2 were not so good, 2 were good. I’ve even take some time off work to just sit on the couch and read. As if somehow, giving myself permission to slow down and not focus on the crazy swirling around me, even if just for an afternoon. I have my next book picked out (Confessions of a Domestic Failure, because it’s supposed to be light and fun) – but if you have any must read suggestions, please share.

We are also making a point to see friends. It’s hard when life feels like it’s falling apart to make time to socialize. But, we are having friends over for dinner every few weeks, as a way to keep ourselves a bit social. And if people are willing to come see us, then we don’t have to mess up the toddler’s bedtime, and right now, that structure is fairly important to us. So thankfully we have some friends who are willing to visit us.

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