And Now We Wait!!!

  Posted on June 25, 2015 By

 111 Comments

It’s official, we are through every single required step necessary for us to adopt!!  We have successfully navigated the international pre-adoption process!

We have been approved in our province in Canada for a while now.  But now we are also through all the necessary steps in the USA as well!  We have jumped through every single hoop (no matter how ridiculous it seemed) and our profile book is done!

We are now waiting adoptive parents!!!!  

(I don’t think there are enough exclamation marks in the world to adequately illustrate how excited and happy we are about this).

So the plan now is that we:

  • Wait for our phone to ring.
  • Try not to obsess about the potential of our phone ringing.
  • Keep preparing for baby to arrive into our lives.
  • Hope that a birth mother likes us and entrusts us with the life of her child.
  • Live a normal life without focusing on waiting for an unknown amount of time.
  • We answer every single phone call, including the ones from numbers we don’t know (i.e. potential telemarketers) because we cannot miss that phone call.
  • Try not to hound our lawyer – the lawyer does not need to spend his time answering my useless questions, he needs to spend his time matching us.
  • Prepare for more upcoming adoption bills.  We do seem to bleed green these days.
  • Try not to panic about why we have not been chosen yet (I expect this to become a problem for me in a few months time).
  • Not obsess over our biggest fear – a failed adoption.  Rationally, I know that we cannot prepare for that type of an outcome and we will just have to deal with it if it happens.  Part of me is afraid of having an adoption fall through in the end, but I do believe it is a birth mother’s right to choose to parent.  As we cannot change this possibility, for now needs to stay focused on the hope that our match will work out perfectly.
  • Try not to worry about the international match process that we will navigate while being in the USA with our baby.  It’s going to be complicated and it’s going to be stressful.  But we cannot change it so we might as well not worry about it.
  • Celebrate that we made it through the entire approval process.  The adoption approval process is no joke, I’m proud that we made it through everything in a decent timeline.  When we started in December my optimistic goal was the end of June and we did it!!

We anticipate being matched with a birth mother in any of the US states.  We expect that we will be matched with a third trimester pregnancy or with a baby that has been born that day or the day before.  We have been told to expect a match time anywhere from a few months to about a year.  Of course, there are no guarantees as the timeline is dependent on a birth mother falling in love with our profile – this is out of our hands.  So now, I have to put my faith in the universe that our profile will fall into the hands of our birth mom sooner rather then later.  I have to really back away from doing anything, and just let it be.  I have to practice being patient because there is absolutely nothing I can do to speed this up.

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 Category: Adoption      Tags: , , , , , , , , , ,

111 Comments on “And Now We Wait!!!”

  2. Oh my god. I got butterflies in my tummy reading this. I am so excited for you! It blows my mind that you could get a call telling you your baby has been born and ready for you to go meet him or her! I’m so excited for you, MPB. May the waiting period be brief!

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    • Thank you so much Lindsay!! Soon enough it will be my turn to listen to a two year old try to find ways to stay up late at night!! I am so excited for that day (although by then you might need to remind me of that).

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  5. Wow! Congratulations! What a big step! Here’s hoping that phone rings soon, and that everything goes smoothly from that point on. We’re all in love with your writing, so I’m sure there’s a birth mother out there who’s going to love your adoption book too. 🙂

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    • Awe, thank you so much, I really hope she does fall in love with us and it’s the perfect match!! It is such a huge step, we are both so happy right now and trying to hold onto the happy for as long as possible, because I know at some point the waiting will become tedious.

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    • Thank you! You are right, it feels pretty awesome to have reached this milestone. It’s scary to think that from here on out the milestones are truly life changing! Scary and exciting and exhilarating too!! 🙂

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  10. Congratulations!! So excited for you!! Hopefully it won’t be long now… I had friends (gay dads) who got their baby 2 weeks after approval! It doesn’t necessarily have to take a long time… it just comes down to when that perfect match bun is done in the oven!

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  16. YAY!!!! That is so awesome. I am so excited for you and your husband. The wait is going to be killer, but totally worth it in the end. I can’t wait until you get that call. ❤

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  17. Whoop whoop! I know you are glad to have that done! I’m happy that we both have some things to celebrate now. Hoping you don’t have to wait much longer.

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  18. Fantastic!! What an amazing feeling!! So pleased that you’re just where you need to be and looking forward to happy updates very soon! 🙂 xx

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  20. Yay!!
    Reminds me of Friends, and if we are really really quiet, we can hear the sound of a condom breaking 🙂
    Am sorry, bad joke, but boy I am excited for you both :))

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  23. If you end up getting matched in Michigan I’ve got a room for you guys! So happy you are too this point. I know you will be matched soon, who wouldn’t want you guys as parents for their baby?!?!

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  25. How incredibly exciting!! And what a tough process to get through! I have looked into it, and you are right…it’s no joke that’s for sure. I bet someone out there will be falling in love with your profile sooner than you think 🙂

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  27. YAYA! Congrats! I have so much to catch up on, but this!!!! This is super exciting… This is the best news and EEEEP! It’s here! I am hoping the wait is short!

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  28. How exciting for you and your husband. It much feel like such a relief to finally have that step finished and now onto getting that phone call. I have to admit the part about answering all incoming calls gives me anxiety, I absolutely hate answering when random numbers call. Sending prayers your way that the last steps move quickly. xo

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    • You are right, it is a pretty big relief to know that the next step is to be matched!! We too hate answering random numbers, in fact Mr. MPB ignored one just yesterday and I reminded him that we have to answer them from now on. I suspect this means that I’m going to be talking to a lot more telemarketers unfortunately!

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  29. If I wasn’t sitting down…I’d be doing a crazy happy dance for you right now!!! So happy that you’re through it and I think the plan you’ve put into place for the waiting time is a great one. I hear the wait is the hardest because you don’t have the paperwork to keep you busy. Hope to be in waiting mode with you very soon! Big hugs!!!!

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    • Thank you so much my friend!! I am beyond excited and also dreading the wait! I too have heard that this is the hardest part. But I am excited for both of us to be waiting! You will be here soon too!! 🙂

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  30. Yay! Well done on reaching your optimistic goal. That’s fantastic. I can see how the waiting could do your head in a bit (like the world’s longest 2WW) but hang in thete and keep dreaming of your baby. Xx

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  31. Doing a happy dance for you at my desk at work!!!! HOORAY!!!! I am grinning from ear to ear just thinking about the moment when you guys get that call.

    And now I’m getting all misty-eyed thinking about it! UGH! ❤ ❤ ❤ Can't wait to see THAT post!!!!!

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  35. That’s so awesome! Congratulations. I’m reminded of an episode of Friends when Monica and Chandler pass the home study and they say all they have to do is wait for a phone call to say there’s a baby waiting for them, then the phone rings but when they pick it up it’s just Joey asking for his bat… I guess you had to be there. haha.

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  36. This is so exciting! I am amazed by how much you two have accomplished in under a year! I remember how daunting this process was to you, yet you have passed with flying colours! And now, we wait, which is arguably the most personally difficult part, but I hope your wait is short, and that you get to start the beginning of your new life.

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    • Thank you so much my friend! You are right, it is pretty amazing that we have accomplished all the steps needed in such a short time frame! I too hope our wait is short and we can move on from this stage in life!

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      • Us too. We can’t wait until this ” baby acquiring stage” is over, so we can finally start a life of parenting. I think that’s why we’re in such a hurry for número dos too.

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  38. congrats!! this is awesome and i’m so excited for you!! I love it when everything just falls into place!!! looking forward to when you announce your new family member!!

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  39. Oh snap!!!’ Friend, this brought tears to my eyes. After everything you both have been through, this is where you are supposed to be, right now, Waiting for that phone call. I honestly, could not be happier for you both. Cheers to a baby in your arms soon!

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    • Thank you!! I so hope that everything falls into place now without too much delay or additional heartbreak! We are just so excited and hopeful right now and that’s pretty amazing!

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  40. Congrats!! I’m sure you’ll get called soon. You’re a good writer, I’m sure you personal statement will win the heart of some pregnant lady.

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  43. Sooooo Exiting!!!! I hope that phone call comes soon, because I figure every time that phone rings your heart is going to jump lol. So happy for you. 🙂

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  47. Yippeeee!! I am so happy for you guys.

    Now…. maybe, if/when you feel ready, you could start looking at what you may need for a baby? Like different formulas etc? Just speaking from my conversations with an adoptive parent acquaintance. I know how you like to be super prepared and do your research 😉

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    • AND I know I probably don’t have to say it but I will… I obviously respectfully and with appreciation of what you have been through make that suggestion. I understand you may not be ready or even want to go there yet BUT then you might be excited for this part too x

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      • We are starting to look into this stuff! Right now we are thinking about the absolute necessities for when baby joins our lives – a stroller, car seat, baby monitor, etc. I haven’t gotten to the formula yet, but that’s next on the list I guess.
        Thanks so much for your excitement and your suggestions!! 🙂

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      • Oh you are so welcome. I am so excited for you!! If you need any help or want to bounce ideas then don’t hesitate to ask 🙂 I remember how under prepared we were for Little Man so even if you left it until the last moment it’ll all work out!

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  48. * I know this comment doesn’t particularly fit here, but I wanted to be sure to share it with you in case you didn’t already know about it. Your story of losses is a poignant one and worthy of sharing as you have. Here is a link to a site about baby loss — mostly miscarriage, some stillbirths included as well with the women’s stories expressed how they were often dismissed in their feelings of grief.

    I didn’t know if you already knew about this site and/or wanted to contribute your own personal story or maybe it’s just another reminder that you are not alone in this abyss of pregnancy loss.

    THE SITE called Don’ Talk About the Baby: http://www.donttalkaboutthebaby.com/#!voices/cswv

    Hugs <3,
    Etc.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

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