Spiraling

This week has been hard,

Someone I love is spiraling.

Quite possibly to the point of no-return.

I have no ability to influence the situation. No ability to make them see reason. No ability to help them make better choices. Instead I am on the sidelines, watching. But this isn’t about me. My struggle on the sidelines is irrelevant right now.

What is relevant is the potential loss of a young life, a life with so incredibly much potential, and a person loved by so many.

If the stars align, attitudes change, and good choices are made, there is still hope. Hope that treatment will be a choice they make. And, then hope that a bed can be found, before it’s too late.

But, as much as I hope, I fear I will be going to a funeral, and my family will be torn apart once again.

* Please, if you are struggling, ask for help before it’s too late, people love you and people are here to help. Call a local help line or call a friend or a family member. Reach out and talk to someone like Crisis Services Canada – 1.833.456.4566.

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Locker Room Talk

Little MPB: Mommy, Boobies!!!! 

Me: Yes Little MPB, Mommy has boobies.  But how about we don’t shout that as loud as we can at swimming class?

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Another mother in the change room laughed and said I just love that age!  That’s why I had 5!

To which I responded, while laughing I also love this age – it’s so much fun. Although right now, I’m really just hoping he doesn’t feel the need to continue to point out my body parts while we are in a swim class that is all Dad’s. (As an aside, I’m not sure how I ended up being the only mom in swimming class this time, but I actually think it’s great to see that it’s not just a mom and baby/toddler activity).

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Her little girl, probably about 8 years old, then said: But, mommy, I’m not one of the 5 you had.

The mom: No you’re not, I adopted you to be part of the family.

Little girl: I don’t like telling people I’m adopted. 

The mom:  Why?

Little Girl: They always feel bad for me, because I wasn’t one of your kids from the start.

The mom: Well, I think adoption is great.

To which I added in:  I also think adoption is great for bringing families together.  This little guy is adopted to.*

The little girls eye’s just lite right up.  The mom also looked surprised and said: See, you never know who else is adopted too.

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* We don’t regularly tell random people Little MPB is adopted, we figure that’s not a discussion we have to have with everyone in the world.  But, in this occasion, it just felt right and Little MPB is still at an age that he doesn’t care.  And, for the record, I was not at all trying to tell this little girl her adoption feelings are wrong, I just wanted to let her know she’s not alone as an adopted kid.

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