Review of Ever Upward Chapter 3 – Owning Adoption
Justine Brooks Froelker over at Ever Upward, approached me to review a chapter of her upcoming book Ever Upward: Overcoming the Lifelong Losses of Infertility to Own a Childfree Life. I’m really looking forward to reading her entire book, so of course I agreed without hesitation because how could I turn down a sneak peak?
Before I jump into my review, I would like to acknowledge that Justine and I have and are living very different infertility journey’s, yet we are bound together in our shared grief as we have both lost our babies much too soon. Losing a baby, or babies, to miscarriage is an unfortunate ‘club’ to belong to, but I am thankful I have fellow bloggers like Justine in my life as we traverse the ongoing rapids of grief, hope and recovery.
When Justine approached me, I instantly selected her chapter on the topic of Adoption. I chose this chapter because it’s near and dear to my heart as we are currently working to determine if adoption is a route for us when/if we decide to stop trying for a biological child.
So, what were my thoughts when I read this chapter??
Reading this chapter was the first time I’ve read anything about Justine and her husband’s adoption journey. She goes to great length to explain what the adoption journey looked like for her. How the journey affected her, her husband and even members of her extended family. How others viewed there decision and how others attempted to “help” them, even when the help actually caused more pain and suffering for Justine. In this chapter, Justine also shares how, when they decided not to pursue adoption, her family still grew in unexpected ways.
In my read of this chapter, one of the first things that stuck me is that I saw a new side of Justine. This side is one of living the vulnerability and the pain, not one of recovery. I’ve gotten to know Justine through her blog, where she usually writes about her recovery and provides encouragement to others. So, it was especially interesting to me to read about her life before reaching recovery. Through this chapter I felt really understood one of her key turning points, and how she was able to lift herself up, and move from a life consumed by sorrow, to a life of recovery. This chapter showed a very human side of Justine, not as a counselor or a person living recovery or as someone trying to breakdown the infertility silence, but as a person in the throws of the infertility struggle, who is hurting and quite possibly even lost.
Maybe most importantly, from a literary perspective, Justine shares her story with grace and elegance that I’m grown to expect from her writing.
After reading one short chapter, I was left with a few questions, and ultimately wanting more. Needless to say, I am hooked. I can assure you, I will be one of the first people purchasing her book when it is available on October 1, 2014 at www.everupward.org.
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