The Family Visit

So, once the disaster of a flight ended, we proceeded to get our bags and stand in line for our car rental.  After about 30 minutes of waiting in line I decided to check the confirmation email.  Turns out I was standing in the wrong line, and by the time I figured it out the line for the right car rental company was twice as long.  Fun times.

Finally we got our car and I don’t think I’ve ever been so thrilled to leave an airport in my life!

We drove straight to Mr. MPB’s parents house where we’d stay for the weekend.  We whisked his mom and dad off for some lunch and some fun at a local children’s exhibit.  We spent the entire day out and about.  We kept everyone busy and had some fun.  Baby MPB went to bed past his normal bed time and it was an epic disaster.  He was an unhappy kid which resulted in an unhappy house.  Eventually he settled and the adults had a late dinner. Lesson learned, decision not to compromise his bed time reaffirmed.

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Day two, the day of the party, started off good.  Mr. MPB’s mom really wanted to take Baby MPB to his first visit to their local beach.  So we all went and enjoyed a beautiful walk on the beach on a beautiful day.  Baby MPB slept through the entire thing.

We went back to the house to get ready for Baby MPB’s cousin to arrive.  Cousin MPB is 4 months older then Baby MPB and this was their first ever visit.  I think everyone was incredibly excited.  But, then we got a call from Mr. MPB’s brother.  Their baby is sick and is incredibly contagious. Because one of Cousin MPB’s parents is a doctor we knew instantly what we were dealing with and she was very straight forward about the risks to Baby MPB, which far outweighed the risks to Cousin MPB due to their age difference. The four parents made a quick plan that was doctor approved – Cousin MPB will not be held by anyone but the parents.  All 4 parents will not touch each others babies.  The babies will not touch each other and will not share any toys.  Anyone who wants to touch Baby MPB must wash their hands first and do so before they touch Cousin MPB.  The plan basically rested on good hand washing practices and aware parents.  Simple really.

Except it wasn’t.  Mr. MPB’s mom lost it on us.  She proceeded to tell us we have ruined the party and the entire visit.  Baby MPB can get sick and it’s not a big deal if he get it.  Then she stormed out of the room while throwing papers across the room in a childish temper tantrum. Ummmm……First, it’s not our fault someone else’s kid is sick. Second, we are his parents and we decide what is best for him and what is not.  We think asking people to wash their hands is a perfectly okay thing to do.  Also, a medical doctor just told us we absolutely cannot let Baby MPB get this, he’s still too young to risk it.  Third, seriously, what grown adult needs to throw things?  How is that going to help in any way?

And so, the babies were held by their parents and watched each other from afar.  The parents visited from opposite sides of the table, just as we normally would.  No, it wasn’t the dream first meeting, but it was okay.  We did get some great family photos and we had a great time visiting without hugs.

As for the party, it went well.  Baby MPB loves being held so he enjoyed lots of snuggles and love from everyone.  No-one was upset by the request that they wash their hands, in fact most people just did anyways.  Baby MPB and Cousin MPB both went to bed as per their normal schedules – no-one complained about their bed times.  In fact, at one point a few of the ladies with similar aged grand-kids of their, own pointed out that Baby MPB was getting tired and it was probably time for bed. And, even though the babies went to bed, the party continued well into the evening.  The adults chatted the evening away while enjoying great company with a few glasses of wine.  There were even blue vanilla cupcakes.  It was delightful.

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Day three, our last day, was great.  We spent the day with my family who was also in town that weekend.  My family loved Baby MPB.  In fact, everyone wanted to hold him so both Mr. MPB and I enjoyed eating our breakfast warm while everyone else played with him.   one of my relatives is also an adoptive mom so we were able to talk about some stuff that most people just don’t get – like the hell we endured in the USA when Baby MPB was born – we generally don’t talk about that with anyone because it was that insane.  But she understood because she went through her own version of it many years ago. It was liberating to talk to someone who truly gets it. Honestly, it was just so nice to see her as it’s been over 8 years since our list in-person visit.

Day three ended with our flight home.  The return flight was much better then the first flight.  Thankfully.

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21 Comments on “The Family Visit

  1. It sounds like most of the trip went well. I am so glad for that. Mr. MPBs Mom throwing that tantrum made me laugh and pissed on your behalf at he same time. That kind of behavior you have to just laugh at. So glad you guys held your ground and protected your little angel. Xo

    Liked by 1 person

    • What is up with parents acting like children?! So disappointing, but isn’t it reassuring to see that every other adult “gets it”? Glad you enjoyed the rest of your trip, for the most part. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I hear you on having time to talk about your experiences. I’ve found that more and more of my friends are APs because we have shared experiences that allow us to be more open than with some of my other friendships. It’s a big time of change.

    Granny is a bit, um, whatever…so glad the trip went well! Yay!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ohhhhh adult tantrums. Sounds like she was the one that needed the nap! I would not have been able to hold it together after that, you seem super graceful!

    Glad you had a great trip for the most part!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. My dad doesn’t throw things, but he has tantrums quite often. I agree with mamajo in that you just have to laugh. If I don’t laugh, I’ll get angry. 😉

    Honestly, I’m a little surprised that the sick cousin came. I’m not a mom who worries about a modified bed time for social circumstances, other kids sniffles, or people washing hands before touching my babies (I don’t know why!)… But a seriously contagious illness that a doctor says my baby can’t handle…. Keep that kid away! I’m shocked that they made the decision to come. I’ve made the decision to not come many times when my kid has the nasty sickness.

    I’m glad it went well after the first day. Perhaps that first day was rough because tensions were high from travel and just the anticipation. I know that once I settle in, the subsequent days are better. My kids always sleep like crap the first night no matter what time they go to bed and then are dreams all subsequent nights, which makes sense because I’m the same way! Being with family takes an adjustment period for me and then there is a set shelf life before i need to get out of there!

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    • I’m not implying that you were the only tense one on day 1. I’m sure MIL had her class out without realizing it. I think everyone was probably nervous.

      Liked by 1 person

    • I should clarify that the sick cousin also travelled to be there. When they left she was fine, but by the time they got to us, their baby was sick. They actually arrived hours late as they had to go to a walk-in clinic to get a prescription (it’s illegal here for dr.’s to prescribe for their own family members). So, it’s not like they could easily have just stayed home. Otherwise, I suspect they would have just stayed home,
      Also, yes, laughter was the only option. Honestly, I’ve never witnessed her throwing things before when she’s been mad. And I will admit I was very upset and have some strong feelings about her doing that with a baby in the room….

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Whoa, what a temper tantrum from your MIL! It sounds like you handled it well and stuck with the doctor approved plan. Glad that otherwise things went well and good visit.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sounds like a pretty great trip overall! Just like you being cautious, I have been cautious with this pregnancy. I even got to the point of not seeing my brother and his family at all during a trip across country because I didn’t want to risk getting a sickness they all had had for months basically. My brother and his family totally understood and there was no drama. I wish that for you because it is possible! I am glad you stuck to what was best for you…and also were all able to move on and enjoy a nice couple of days. Xo

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  7. Whoa! Grandma really lost it for a second there! How old is MPB baby now? Charlje got a virus at seven weeks old and they almost hospitalized her-it’s a big fucking deal when they’re little. Glad you guys held strong and took precautions!

    Also, your blanket is off to a good start! It’s even better than the last one I did so far. Can’t WAIT to get it to you!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Well, it sounds like for the most part things went well! Sorry Mr’s mom threw a hissy fit for no reason…but so excited for you that you got the blue cupcakes!! And hooray for an easier trip home.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Well it wouldn’t be a family get together if everyone minded their manners now…ha…glad to hear for the most part it went well. And you got your cupcakes 💙

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