Adoption Finalization Update
I feel like I’m due for an adoption process update.
As per normal the adoption process causes me nothing but stress and anxiety.
Except….when our lawyer said that possible unknown birth father rights weren’t terminated. Then, I had a mini-meltdown on the phone. Thankfully, he realized what he said and took the time to talk me off the ledge and re-explained what he said in much better language. What he meant to say is that the paperwork is actually confirming that the possible known birth father rights were voluntarily terminated and that the state’s law automatically terminates any other unknown birth father’s rights after 30 days. So, clearly, we are passed the 30 day mark and no-one can try to claim Baby MPB.
Anyways, other then that one minor heart-attack inducing hiccup ,the adoption finalization stuff doesn’t really get to me. Thankfully.
We have all the adoption costs tallied, all the paperwork signed and submitted, and all our agencies and lawyers have also completed their necessary paperwork. So, as of now all our paperwork has been submitted to the courts! Now, we just wait for a court date for the adoption finalization. We have no idea when the date will be, it could be anytime in the next 2ish months, 4ish months, or 6ish months or potentially even longer for all we know. (We are told the family court’s priority is emergency situations where children are at risk. Which means we are not a priority and so we wait, which makes sense in my mind).
In all likelihood we wont be required to travel for the adoption finalization as our lawyers will represent us. But, I’m trying to convince Mr. MPB we should attend – to be present at the finalization would be pretty amazing. Somehow I think it would be a beautiful way to end this story of becoming a family. To actually stand before the judge just seems more…..I don’t know the right word….but it sounds like a much more amazing experience then having our lawyer call us afterwards and say it’s done.
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I think it would be so wonderful for you all to be there.
I don’t know what the Canadian system is like, but my parents had my baby sister since she was 2 weeks old, she was really sick and had a heart condition (born to my dad’s mentally challenged sister and brother-in-law who were also into drugs and came to live with us so we could help take care of her and then left in the night not to return for many months, and then, only for a coupe of hours) and the adoption for her wasn’t final until she was 5 years old! But we had to deal with push back from the parents the whole time, though they were not in her life or fit to take care of a special needs child, or any child. I hope it goes much quicker and smoother for you!
But we all went to the courthouse when it was finalized, we left school even for that moment. And it was a really exciting moment. For the judge to tell us that the process is complete was like a weight lifted off of our shoulders, and then they took a picture of all of us together, legally and officially for the first time, and it was a very special moment. You will not regret traveling for that moment.
Good luck!
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I’m unsure if international adoption is different, but we all (baby included) had to be at the court for the finalization. It was a short and sweet ceremony, but a wonderful way to celebrate our son legally joining our family. If you can go, I’d recommend it.
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We are right where you are with finalizing Mary’s adoption, and I’ll say, we’ve spoken to other adoptive parents and adoptee’s and the general concensus is that Adoption Day is so special to them. It’s almost like, they’ve always known and FELT that they were a family, but this kinda puts the mortar on the bricks, if that makes sense. We can’t WAIT for Mary’s adoption day, and neither can she. The most exciting part for her? “A party and cake with my new “REAL” cousins! Oh, and my Adoption Day photo shoot with my brothers so everyone can see my face on Snapchat!” #GOALS
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I’d want to be there, too!
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I also think it would be a great day to have a celebration also! Make a day out of it with family and friends:) They have special boards you can make up on pinterest for photos too.
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Well I’m glad pretty much everything is done, except the last court date. I would definitely want to be there for that!! It would definitely make it more meaningful, and would be a hugely emotional moment I think. I’m on your side, I think you should go!!! Hopefully you won’t have to wait forever for that date to come!
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I am glad its almost over, and can completely understand why you want to be there. Ask Mr MPB, why not , what would make the day special to him, then do all the stuff both of you want to do, and anything you think baby might want to see when he gets older. Such as professional photo shot, a big family BBQ, or just the two of you recording your hopes and dreams for him, while the three of you curl up together at home. Whatever suits you three, do you three always want to celebrate his got ya day ? If so maybe something that will be done every year on that day, a tradition to celebrate how you came to be a family. His birthday celebrates him, and his got ya day celebrate, how he came to be yours. Anyway, enough from me, its all about you three, so however little or big you want to make this celebrate, I am just so happy he’s yours, hugs.
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I’m excited for all of you! Hope and I appeared in court via Facetime, and our family were here at the house watching. We had a big family lunch and cake.
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I think it would be amazing for you to be there also. Just something about it would probably make it feel more real and official to you!
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Sounds like a great opportunity for a family vacation and a momentous celebration
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