I Think It’s Time To Do Something Just For Me

  Posted on September 1, 2015 By

 52 Comments

I’m seriously contemplating doing something just for me.

I’ve thought about it since I was probably 15 or 16.  And yet, literally half my life later, I still have not done it.

There’s always been an excuse not to do it.  But there I am today, thinking it might just now be time to take the plunge.

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So, what is it that I’m talking about?

I’m considering getting a breast reduction.

I am a pretty typically sized women – not pencil thin or particularly heavy.  But, I typically wear about a 32 I or J depending on the bra*.

I spent over $200 per bra in order to get one that keeps them up and keeps me comfortable.

My back has always bothered me and I’ve always had less then ideal posture.

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So why now?

I always said I’d get a reduction once I had children and breastfed.  You know, since the real biological point of boobs is breastfeeding, I thought I’d keep mine intact until they served there purpose.

But, now, after over 15 years of putting off the surgery, I think it might just be time.  We’ve been through five miscarriages, have chosen to adopt and will formula feed our child, I think it’s time to move on with life.  I think it’s time to stop waiting.  I think it’s time to do something just for me.

Yet, there are risks to think of:

  • First, here is the chance we may have a second child one day.  And with that, a very slim chance we might try the old-fashioned way again.  And that might mean I would want to try breastfeeding.  But you know, the chances are so slim that it’s almost not worth contemplating.  And even then, if we ever did end up with a successful pregnancy that child too would be just fine being formula fed.
  • Second, I cannot help but wonder, what will Mr. MPB think?  He says he’s okay with it, and if I want to do it, go for it.  Yet, I believe no matter what people say physical appearances and physical attraction do matter.  We’ve been through enough, I’d like to not add an issue like that to our marriage.
  • Third, scarring.  Let’s just say one should not google breast reduction scaring unless you are prepared to see fresh scaring which is not very attractive and even just scary looking.
  • Surgeries are not that much.  I’ve had more then enough in the last few years, and the idea of another one makes me cringe.
  • Who knows when we will get placed with an adoption.  I’d hate to have a surgery and not be able to pick up our baby for multiple weeks as I heal.

As I live in Canada, it’s quite likely that the surgery will be covered by our medical system, or at least mostly covered.  But, it will also be a long wait to get in to see a surgeon and then to get in for the actual surgery – I’m guessing at minimum over a year.

All this said, I have decided next time I see my family doctor I am going to ask for a referral to a surgeon.  I’ve thought about it long enough, that it’s time to a surgeon and find out about scaring, wait times and medical risks.

Honestly, it feels like it’s time for me to do something just for me.  After years of losses, watching my body do the exact opposite of what it should and seconding guessing my body, it might just be an important step towards learning to appreciate my body once again and reclaiming some of my old self.

*things I never thought I’d do – share my bra size with the world.

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 Category: Adoption, Infertility, Medical System      Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

52 Comments on “I Think It’s Time To Do Something Just For Me”

  2. I’ve thought about having this done for years and years!! But like you, I always thought I’d wait until after kids to deal with it. I have dents in my shoulders from my bras, and my back hurts most days, and I have horrible posture as well. Why are we so alike? lol! If you feel it will take that long to even get in for a consult, you should start asking now. Fingers crossed you won’t be waiting that long for a baby!

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  3. Girl, do it. DO IT. DOOOOOO IT. I had a breast reduction at 22 and it was the best decision I ever made. I had literally all the same concerns as you, especially breastfeeding and what Kevin would think (let’s just say to call him a “boob man” would be the understatement of the century).

    As for your other concerns… depending on how small you want to go and the surgeon you find, there is a good chance that they may be able to do the surgery with liposuction. That’s what I did, instead of the “full monty” as I call it (aka… the scary pictures you are seeing online). I was very happy with the results of the liposuction, and my scars are basically non-existent — two small lines UNDER each breast about the size of a staple, pretty much completely invisible these years later (as if anyone looks under your boob anyway). Plus the recovery was EASY. I had a LOT of bruising and the first couple days were pretty sore, but I didn’t even take my prescription meds for pain management because it wasn’t that bad at all. The worst of it was that I am a stomach sleeper and had to sleep on my back for a week or two before the tenderness/bruising had gone down.

    Something else to weigh into the decision making process!

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    • Oh, and with the liposuction the doctor said I should still be able to breastfeed as there were no incisions in any of the “duct work” in the breast. And at 24 weeks pregnant, the twins are already leaking clear fluid so I’m working under the impression that they will produce milk as normal. Besides, there are plenty of women who have 100% “natural” breasts who don’t produce milk, don’t produce enough supply, can’t get baby to latch, or otherwise struggle to feed… it’s a roll of the dice either way.

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    • So, first THANK YOU!!!
      Second, I had no idea a less invasive liposuction procedure might be an option! I will absolutely be looking into this further and asking lots of questions. The less invasive the better.
      Third, I honestly haven’t thought much about how small I want to go. I just know I want to fit into a normal sized bra, not have them constantly in the way and bugging my back. Oh, and I also want to just look more proportional. So, what that means for me, I have no idea. I’m hoping the surgeon will be helpful in this regard?
      Fourth, I’m a stomach sleeper, but I guess I will have to learn to sleep on my back while I recover.
      Fifth, I’ve decided the whole breastfeeding thing cannot really even factor into my decision any more. Honestly, the chances of us trying again and successfully having a child are so slim that it’s not really fair to continue to put my life on hold. And honestly, formula will feed our adopted child and can feed our biological child should one ever exist. I’ve come to realize that what matters is that our child gets nutrition, not that our child is breastfed. That said, I do appreciate the information you can share and will clearly be asking the surgeon about it when I meet with him/her one day.
      Sixth, I booked the first appoint with my family doctor to get a referral. So, the process has officially started! 🙂

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  4. Go for it.
    I follow a blogger who had breast reduction and then gave birth twice. She also had a long battle with infertility. She was able to produce milk and breastfeed a bit. She gave up because of latching issues and lack of breast feeding support. Do it for yourself if you want to!

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    • Thanks so much for sharing and encouraging! I did book an appointment with my family doctor to get a referral so I’ve started the process. Who knows what will happen between now and then, but at least I’m on the path to more information and possibly more comfort. 🙂

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  5. You go girl! I 100% fully support you doing something just for you. I think you are absolutely right that it is time to talk to a surgeon about all of these things. You can still back out at any time if you’re not comfortable with it. And you can even share with your surgeon about the adoption and he might have some suggestions on timing. Go you! It’s funny, when I read your title, I immediately thought, “this has something to do with breasts.” Haha, no idea why that popped into my mind. And I love that you shared your breast size with the world. I am a barely-B cup, so there you go, I just shared mine, too.

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    • I am with theskyandback ! Go for it. Also have barely B ( with a good push up bra :). My sister had implants (blessed with my same cup size) and BF fine.

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      • I don’t think I’ve said it in a while – I love you two women! Thank you both for always encouraging me! And I love that you both joined me in sharing your bra size. I can honestly say that’s something I never thought I’d do! It’s like my very obvious and out there secrete – just by looking at me everyone knows they are big, but almost no-one knows just how big. I’d give anything for them to be smaller, so thankfully surgery is an option.
        theskyandback – how the heck did you guess that this post was about breasts? 🙂

        Liked by 2 people

  7. I’m another chiming in to go for it! I have friends who’ve done it and not a one regrets it. The very slim possibility of having to breastfeed in your future is not a good reason to postpone taking care of your health.

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  8. I say do it!! It’s your body. The scars your seeing are fresh scars. The diminish over time, they become barely noticeable after time. I’ve heard lots of stories of mothers breastfeeding after surgery. I’m glad I found your blog. I can’t wait to catch up:)

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    • Thanks so much for your encouragement! Yes, the fresh scars are super gnarly looking, but of course they will heal with time.
      And happy reading, I’m always honoured when someone stops by and stays. I look forward to getting to know you too. 🙂

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  10. Do it!!!!!

    Like you, I am a set of tits on legs 😍😎. Same thing with all the special bras, etc. The only off the rack bras I can buy are wacaol at the bay. They have a minimizer I live in and it’s not actually my correct size (I think they ‘mall size’ them to take the shock out it for women who’ve never been properly sized and are in denial….) but they take 1.5 inches off and I do bra surgery so it works out. I don’t like how elomi, panache etc make my boobs even more prominent, so I’m always on the hunt for minimizers. Though I have of course dropped some bucks on Chantelle, perle, etc.

    I come from large busted stock and I am the only one who hasn’t had a reduction yet because like you, I was waiting until I had a child. I’m putting myself back on the waiting list (2 years in bc) as soon as baby is born. After the HG I think we’ll just have one, plus I’ll be 41 by the time I give birth again and age is another consideration, but I digress….

    Everyone I know who’s had one doesn’t regret it. I’ve had 2 cousins and 1 friend even have revision surgery to go a cup or two smaller. I personally also think they look better, too. Clothes drape better, you’re not always wrestling with bras, you can wear rounded necks without looking dumpy and you have more options and less thinking to do.

    When I put my Ivf 25 lbs the biggest thing to change in my body was my boobs – they went 36 dd to 36 G. It sucked. I’ll be honest, in my opinion, after a certain age, unless you are putting your boobs out there front and centre they go from making you look sexy to matronly. I feel that big boobs age me.

    So for what irks worth, I say: reduce!!!!!

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    • Thank you so much for sharing and encouraging!!! I hate that you totally get the struggle, but do appreciate your insight. I have no idea what the wait will be here, but I did make an appointment with family doctor so I’m at least starting the process. I’m curious how long it will take, but I’m also not stressing over it.

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  11. My big boobs have caused me even more pain during pregnancy! Between my shoulder blades is rock hard from the weight of my chest/belly. I, too, have contemplated a reduction. In fact, I had a doctor once who asked me every time I went in (needless to say, I switched doctors as she wasn’t listening to me say: AFTER KIDS!). My husband always says no, but I tell him it’s about me, not him. From friend’s experience (although it may be different in your province), it is about a year long wait. I’m actually totally looking forward to hearing how your experience goes. Good for you for putting yourself high on the priority list. 🙂

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    • Oh my, I’d lose it if a doctor always asked me! I get the reason for one, but I also think there is something to be said about respecting a patients decision.
      I’ll keep you posted on the process. I’ve booked an appointment with my family doctor to get a referral so the process officially started yesterday.

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  12. I have never met a woman who has regretted her decision to get a breast reduction. If it’s something you’ve wanted for a long time, and there might be a wait to see a surgeon and have the procedure done, it makes sense to get the process started now. There’s nothing wrong with formula feeding, so you’re right that that’s not really a factor. From what I’ve heard, the recovery isn’t very long, so even if you happen to have baby coming home soon after or before surgery, you should be okay too. I’m excited for your decision to do something just for yourself!

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  13. When the scars heal they are hardly noticeable. Don’t let that hold you back. Also, many women CAN breastfeed after surgery. It’s not impossible though you may need some patience and help (drugs I mean) should the occasion ever arise. I say do what will make you happy. Your body. Your choice. Maybe once you see the surgeon you can bring Mr. MPB into the decision making of how you want the girls to look post-op? I have known competitive athletes who got right back in the saddle as well so as for recovery time and wait time I wouldn’t sweat it too much.

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  14. Wow! If it’s something you’ve always wanted to do, I say go for it – it will change your life. Appearances DO matter and the way we feel about ourselves is so important. I think you’ve probably thought about it for long enough to be sure it’s the right thing 🙂

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  15. I say go for it. It sounds like you’ve given a lot o consideration to this decision, and what’s the sense in putting it off any longer.

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  17. I say go for it! And seriously, you aren’t talking about reducing them to pimples on your chest. I am sure Mr MPB will be fine. You’ll still be busty. 😉 I actually think you can still breastfeed after breast surfery these days? But maybe that’s implants where nothing is removed? Not sure. Just know there’s an Aus chick on Insta who does weight loss programs who is currently pregnant and talks about both her breast surgery AND her intention to breastfeed. I say if the boobies give you grief at this size then do something about it for sure. I have always said I will get a lift and tuck once I’m done with babies but mine have recovered quite well from feeding Monkey so we’ll see.

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    • Thank you so much for your encouragement! Nope, not thinking about going that small, but honestly hadn’t thought too much about how small I’d go. I just thought thought bit more proportional and so that I can fit into cool an pretty bras. I am so over the ugly bras I get stuck with 🙂

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  18. I had it done, so glad I did. Feel free to PM me with questions. It’s quite likely you could still BF if you go that route, maybe not exclusively, but possible. My scars are not bad. Recovery was easy. My only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner.

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  19. I’m no where near that size but I am larger that I want to be. (Never understood why women want bigger.) I have had issues, and I hate never being comfortable in a bra and never finding tops that fit right. So I say go for it. If you have the means, have the time and can do it physically, definitely do it for you!!

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  20. I’m with ya Sister! I’ve wanted one for a long time now and got J to agree that I could go for a consult if I still wanted one after I lose 30 lbs. problem is I can’t seem to get on track to lose the weight, lol.

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  21. I think it’s important for YOU to feel good about and in your body. If it would make you feel better, then that’s great! I know you will do lots of research first, but I hope you will talk to people who have actually had the procedure done too. Wishing you all the very best! 🙂

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  23. Pingback: Lifting Myself Back Up | My Perfect Breakdown

  24. Go for it! I have same problem but am not done with breastfeeding, we want another god willing, but I have yet to find a bra that is comfortable that I can’t wait to rip off at the end of the day, and holds the girls up as you say. Did you have to get your bras custom, or did you find an off the rack one that worked?

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  25. Drew Barrymore had a breast reduction and recently Ariel something from Modern Family had one and they both look amazing. I think go for it. I’ve always had big boobs and was teased at school etc but thankfully they’re not as big as yours and do not cause me any discomfort. I’d be really interested to hear how you go.

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