An Observation, A Change, A Realization & A Question

  Posted on August 24, 2015 By

 54 Comments

An Observation:

I’ve done nothing baby related for a while now.  We have not unwrapped the gifts we have received and/or items we have purchased on our own.  Nothing.  Instead the nursery looks like a bomb blew up in it as it’s become a dump spot for everything baby related.

20150630 - AmazedI don’t know, after I opened the amazon boxes and saw what was in them, I put everything in the nursery and I stopped.  I was beyond touched and thrilled, but yet I couldn’t bring myself to actually open each item.  Maybe, I refused to take things out of the original packaging because of the fear that something could still go wrong?  Or maybe, I’m still afraid of the actual physical space that is the nursery?  Or maybe I’m just lazy?

Additionally, a few months back we started setting aside a bit of money every month to continue to buy things for our baby.  Sort of a smart way to keep getting the things we need.  But, I noticed that I haven’t been buying anything for a while.  No new purchases of any sort, practical or not.  I’m not a great shopper and Mr. MPB is even worse then I am, so I’m not surprised we let this slide.  But, I think by not buying things the excitement has dropped off.  Maybe it’s that I’ve been too busy with work, or maybe I’ve been avoiding it.  Once again, I don’t really know.

A Change: 

I went into the room.  For the first time, I sat down in the beautiful mid-century modern, 1960s original chair that I bought for the nursery (I still realize this chair may not work in reality, but I loved it and the only way I could justify buying it was for the nursery).

I texted a very special friend and sort of shared the big moment.

I began unpacking everything.

I expected to cry.  I did not.

Instead, I smiled as I thought about how much baby stuff we have already accumulated, and yet smile again when I realized how much we still don’t have.

I was at peace as I opened all of the packaging and began a collection of packaging waste.  And now, all the original packaging has been thrown out.  Now, nohing can be returned just in case something goes wrong.

I laughed out loud as I remembered once saying “barring some sort of super human ability our child will need some sort of mechanism to get the formula into them.”  Seriously, food items is the one thing we have a lot of now.  Our child will be able to eat formula and even solids when the time comes!

20150824 - An Observation_1

I also realized our child now has a few toys and even a giant teddy bear.  And bath time, it’s going to be fun!

I even went to the store and bought baby specific laundry detergent.  Now, all the baby clothing and blankets we have collected are washed and ready to be worn.  (Although still not folded, I still hate folding laundry).

And then I went online and bought a bunch of little things that we will likely need and/or really want when baby arrives – like pacifiers, a bottle brush and a baby thermometer.  I realized having a few more basics on hand is probably smart.

And, while searching for things online I found something we don’t need- age blocks.  I was slightly opposed to getting some because they have become a bit of fad and everyone seems to be doing it, but I found these natural ones fell in love, and I decided to jump on the bandwagon.  They should arrive in a few days and I really hope they are as cute as I expect them to be.

A Realization:

I seem to be moving forward in baby steps.

I seem to embrace something, but then cannot move on to the next step.

It’s like I decide to do something and I do it.  But then I stop, I freeze, and I have to build up the courage to do the next thing.

It’s all taking me time.

And I’m okay with that.  I’ll take all the time in the world, because right now I have time.

If we get an instant placement or even a quick placement, then we’ll just have to step it up and plow through everything without hesitation.  I’ll do it if I have to.  But since I don’t have to right now, I wont force it.

A Question:

Sitting there, I also started to question what do we need for when we meet baby?  We will be flying somewhere, and we need to bring some stuff with us as my priority is meeting baby not stopping at target right when our flight lands.  So, I think we need to pack a bag of absolute necessities for when we fly to meet our baby.  Sort of like a hospital bag for baby.  Any suggestions on what we will need?

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 Category: Adoption, Baby      Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

54 Comments on “An Observation, A Change, A Realization & A Question”

  1. Taking you time is ok. Baby steps are ok. As long as baby is warm, dry, clean, fed and loved there’s nothing that can’t be bought as you need it. I barely bought a thing before Ns birth convinced and terrified something would go wrong and didn’t want to tempt fate. Short of getting the pram and a few clothing items beforehand everything else was bought after we got home.

    I remember someone saying to me that all a baby really needs is your love and this is so true. I bought so much stuff that never got used (I recently found a bag of newborn stuff that I’d totally forgotten about… Annoying because it was super cute)

    As regards a baby bag, I suppose how much you need depends on how long you’ll be away from home but *all* (I use that term loosely) you really need for baby is: SEVERAL sets of vests and sleep suits (it’s amazing how many they can go through in an hour, let alone a day. A couple of cotton hats. A couple of cardigans. Scratch mits (if the sleep suits don’t have integrated ones). Couple pairs of socks if feet are in the open. Blanket. Swaddling blanket (if you’re going to swaddle). Nappies (see vests and sleep suits). Muslins (again, see vests and sleep suits 😉). Milk (again, see vests and, well you get the gist). Cotton wool balls for nappy changes or wet wipes if getting to warm water and a bowl is tricky whilst travelling, I bought the water wipes.

    I can’t wait to read about you finally bringing home baby. x

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  2. Needs for a newborn are very few: swaddling blankets, bottles, diapers, wipes, clothes (lots of these since they get messy easily!). Hat, socks for their teensy feet. Oh, and a sling and/or soft structured carrier to wear them. Babies that tiny don’t really like being away from a warm, soft body so baby will be happier being held by you and Mr. MPB than being in a stroller.

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    • Agree with this. Except it can be very intimidating to use a carrier with a newborn when you’ve never done it so in my view you could skip the carrier if you thought it might be too scary or you’d more likely simply carry babe in arms the first couple of weeks.

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  3. Yay! I love this post. Here’s my list for your Baby Bag:
    Swaddles (at least 4)
    Bottles
    Bottlebrush
    Soap to wash bottles
    Pacifier
    A few books to read to your little one
    Pack ‘n’ Play/whatever crib-type device he or she will sleep in
    Changing pad/diaper caddy (if you don’t have a diaper caddy on your registry already, I can send you a link to one I like that, I think, folds up for easy travel
    Diapers
    Wipes
    Burp cloths (bring a bunch in case you have a spitter-upper)
    White noise app on your phone or white noise machine
    Hat/socks/mittens to keep them from scratching themselves
    Infant carrier (like a Moby Wrap)
    If you’re going to be there for a few days or longer, I’d get a Puj tub so you can wash your babe in the sink (and it folds up easily)
    Baby soap

    P.S. I’ll send my mother-in-law over to fold your laundry for you. 🙂

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    • Note on formula: I might bring a couple of different kinds. One regular of whatever brand and then one for sensitive stomachs, like nutramigen, etc. Lettie threw up all the regular stuff for a while. I don’t think this is common, but would be good to be prepared just in case!

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  4. This is all so exciting! I second what everyone else said about essentials. When it comes right down to eat you just need the supplies to dress, change, feed and help your baby sleep. If you think of it that way it is easy to organize. Additionally the nice to have but not essentials are stuff for play, carry and bath ( although the first few weeks is just warm water). Ahhhhh this post gets me excited!!

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  6. I loved unpacking the baby stuff! It was scary though… So much stuff!

    We bought too much for Matthew, our first. We had it all… And only half was necessary. I had heaps of pacifiers and he refused them. Ha!

    You will go through 10-12 diapers a day, that is not a joke. So don’t take them with you, because you’ll need an entire box for a week. Once you’ve met baby, there will be time that his first/birth mom will want alone with him, so use that time to buy diapers and wipes. Get the sensitive diapers and wipes because you never know how they will react to the materials. You can mess with cheaper diapers once home!

    Take 2 swaddle blankets, 4 muslin blankets, a week’s worth of onesies (2 a day), gowns (a MUST), socks, hats. Bottles are tricky because of cleaning them in a hotel situation (been there, done that). Take 8 bottles, you’ll use that many a day.

    Of course, if you are just going to pick up from the hospital and go on a plane home (no hotel stay with baby), you’ll only need a days worth of everything noted (15 diapers, small pack of wipes, 3 onesies, a sleeper, 1 swaddle sack, 2 muslins, socks, hat).

    How fun!!!

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  7. Yay for opening things up! I’m proud of you. We don’t really have anything for baby except the daycare paraphernalia that I already own and the glider we bought. Taking your time with all of this is totally okay. Despite adoption eventually being a sure thing, it’s scary to think about how long we may have to wait for that day to come. Continue to do things on your own time and when it feels right to you for as long as you can!

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  8. It’s so great that you were able to go into the nursery and unpack some of that stuff. It was even nicer to hear that you got through it with a smile on your face. That made ME smile! As far as things that baby might need, it’s really simple when they are so little. Something warm, a bottle or two, a binky (if they’ll take it!), and a swaddler. We were so surprised to know how little our boys actually needed when they were first born. Now it seems like we can’t leave the house without 3 bags! But from birth until around 3 months, it was all about footie pj’s, blankies and binkies!

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  9. No personal experience with flying to meet baby, but I’d suggest onesies and PJ’s of all sizes (a couple premie, a couple newborn size, and a couple 0-3 months). We were told not to waste our money on newborn clothes so didn’t buy any. Then our girl was born and a decent size — 7lb 3oz but was absolutely swimming in 0-3. We needed newborn sleepers for the first 6 weeks! I was stressed because we had nothing and asked family to buy us some when they came to visit (and I’d pay them back).

    Besides the onesies and sleepers, I can’t think of anything else that you’d need to fly with (clothing wise) besides socks. We had those scratch mittens but she never wore them — we preferred to put socks on her hands! 🙂 Much thicker/more comfortable and stayed on better.

    I hate to say this….but no matter how much you plan, there’s likely to be a thing or two that you have to run out to the store to when baby arrives. But planning is worth it to avoid too many trips!

    Oh, I’m just so excited for you guys. I cannot wait.

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      • The only thing that I’d add is don’t hesitate to ask someone if they can run out and grab ___ or ___ for you. I know that my sister and mother-in-law loved to shop for things that I still needed once baby arrived. I normally don’t ask for help very often, but didn’t want to miss out on precious time with our little one.

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  10. I agree with stuff that all the previous commentators have mentioned. Don’t forget stuff for yourself, pack extra, because you don’t want to be wearing a “spit-upy” shirt the whole day. If you are having a boy, man, they are great at doing fountain pees all over you!

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  11. No firsthand suggestions about the baby bag, but I’m sure other bloggers will have lots of ideas! I hope that packing that bag is FUN! You have a lot to look forward to, even if we don’t yet know when the fun will start!

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    • I’m so sorry I’m so behind on responding to some of my comments, but I did want to say thanks for this one! I love the reminder to have during the waiting and prep stage. I clearly need it sometimes. 🙂

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  12. If you have to clean bottles in a hotel room, you could get a room with a microwave and use the Medela quick steam sanitizing bags. Lots of people have recommended them to us. Don’t forget your camera!!! But I think that one is a given for you. 🙂

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  13. More little blankies, swaddled and washcloths/burp clothes than you think you need. Everything gets spit up on and then it is so stinky!

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  14. Aww, I’m so happy for you! I’ve no idea what you need for a baby bag. But I’m happy to see that MY gift is unpacked! 🙂

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    • So I’m ridiculously slow to respond to this comment (and a few others sadly), but I did want to say thank you! And yes, your gift is unwrapped and officially waiting to be used!! 🙂

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  16. I love that you’re getting there. Baby steps. So to speak.

    You’ll need some diapers, wipes or cloths, bum cream (I have sensitive skinned boys and have gone with Desitin because it has the highest portion of zinc oxide I’ve ever found. Caution, it stains (they all do) and sons clothing. A pacifier if you want to use one, bottles, formula, bottle brush, microwave sterilizer bags and soap to wash the bottles before sterilizing. Some receiving blankets. A car seat if you can’t take transit. That’s it. I’ve got you covered for diapers. Newborn and size 1 since baby A sprouted like a weed and has outgrown both before I could catch a decent nap. 😉 I also put small bottles of Woolite Baby together for our vacation and didn’t use them so I will give you 3 of those so you can bring them with you.

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  17. Honestly? Diapers, food, and a safe place to sleep. The rest of that stuff is so dependent on the kid- some like swaddling, some don’t. Some like pacifiers, some don’t. Strange as it may sound, figuring out what they need is kinda the fun part. So for every run to Target, just think this means you’ve learned a new thing about your kid.

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  18. I’m glad you’ve gotten things opened and unpacked, and that you’ve made a bit of headway getting things done. You got some really cute stuff!! Some day I will get my gift done (or started?) for your baby and get it sent off to you! I think it’s fine that you’re taking your time with things. You can go slow and do what you feel comfortable with, because like you said, you have the time to do that right now. That way you can get everything just how you want it, and not be rushing around like a mad woman last minute. Take your time and get it how you want it. I have no suggestions though as to what you will need for when you pick your baby up…I’ll leave that to the already moms out there 🙂

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  19. Wow, such progress and so exciting! I think you’re handling the unpacking of the nursery at exactly the right pace-yours:) As for baby needs, all of mine were fans of being swaddled and binkies were a must for 3 of my 4. Beyond that and feeding they just need some loving arms which I know you have ready and waiting!

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  20. Everyone has given you some great ideas…..but since you are traveling to the states a lot of the stuff is going to be somewhat impractical. As a new mommy still figuring things out…..here are my suggestions (take or leave them, up to you). I would assume that you are going to be staying at a hotel. Many of them offer a place for babies to sleep for a small fee (usually a portable crib) so you wont have to bring a pack n play or anything like that. I don’t know what diapers or bottles you are planning on using but a package of diapers wouldn’t be a bad idea to put in the diaper bag. And at least a package of wipes as well until you can get to a store for more things. As for bottles/formula you could pack one small canister of formula for newborns or the packages of premeasured powder and like 2-3 bottles. There are a few ways to go with this. The easiest to travel with would be to get the nipple attachements that can be screwed right onto a regular bottle of water (like this: http://www.amazon.com/Refresh-a-Baby-Refresh-Bottle-Adapter-Multicolor/dp/B00AYXA5JE ) The second easiest option would to be to get a bottle or two with a drop in liner so that you don’t constantly have to wash the bottle out and a few extra nipples like this: http://www.target.com/p/playtex-nurser-100ct-4oz-drop-in-liners/-/A-681922#prodSlot=medium_1_15

    I would also recommend a few receiving blankets, and some clothes. Depending on the time of year depends on what you need, but I would say 3-4 onsies will get you started without having to bring a ton of stuff with you, 2 pairs of pajamas and maybe a few pairs of socks, and a hat. If you keep the tiny persons nails trimmed you won’t need scratch mitts. Luke hates them! You could probably also get away with travel sized baby products like lotion, soap/shampoo and diaper cream.

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    • So, I’m way to slow responding to this comment, but I did want to say thank you so much for sharing everything you are learning right now. I know you are super busy with your little guy and I am so appreciative of the time and effort you took to help me out!

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  21. Ooooooo something about this post just made me so excited for your baby. All those baby things? I don’t know what it was but it made me wish and wish and wish that your baby would arrive soon which isn’t helpful to say as I know you are working hard on being patient. So I am wishing hard for you. That Sophie the Giraffe gets around. She is in every baby bag in Australia! The world’s favourite teether I think. Ha! I can see you already have loads of suggestions from some very knowledgeable people about what to pack so I’ll leave that at that. Thinking of you! x

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  22. I’m glad you enjoyed the process of opening and organizing your baby purchases and gifts. i remember doing the same thing and imaging the baby that would use them. one thing i will let you know, in terms of needing things when meeting your baby, you don’t need a second car seat. we crossed the border in both directions this past couple of weeks and they didn’t even give the baby a glance let alone the car seat. ( i talked to my cousin as well that lives in Milwaukee now but is Canadian and for the last 6 years + crossing the border several times a year, they have never looked at the car seats or the kids in fact hahaha). p.s – baby laundry detergent smells the best 🙂

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    • Thanks so much for this comment and your advice (sorry it’s taken me so long to respsond!). The main reason we want a usa specific car seat is that I’d hate to get a ticket while waiting for a judge to approve our adoption – just seems like a bad idea given the circumstances. 🙂

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